Warren Buffet said the economy is going to still be in shambles in 2009. Great, you know what, Warren? That $62 billion you’re worth? It’s now $10 billion. You just gave $50 billion to a charity called the United States Economy. Good luck scraping by on $10 billion. Frazafrickinrumrazernogravahazzleshizzenfurber.
Do not leave a brother hangin’, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers
Move over Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie and Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner, Giselle Bundchen and Tom Brady got married.
But I don’ think Brady and Bundchen are going to be a good couple nickname like Bennifer and Brangilina, Giselle and Tom, sadly, would make Gisom.
The Washington Redskins have signed a defensive tackle, Albert Haynesworth, to a seven-year $100 million deal.
So congratulations everybody, clearly the economic crisis is now over.
In May, Michael Vick will finish his prison sentence for dog fighting under house arrest in Virginia.
One mistake and Vick is back in prison. Or worse, playing for the Oakland Raiders.
At the Arizona Match Play Event, Columbia's Camilo Villegas beat Spain’s Miguel Angel Jimenez 5 and 4.
In addition, Jimenez and Villegas finished second and third to Iran President Mahmoud Amadinejad in the Most Annoying Name Pronunciation Contest.
Since you asked:
Have you noticed how you always seem to see the same people you don't know over and over again? We have a ton of friends all over this neighborhood from school, soccer, the band I play in, the gym, but I never see them when I am out and about. I always see the same people who I don't know.
And at some point don't you have to make a conscious decision to not get to know them? God forbid you cross over into the "Hi, how is it going?" phase just because you always see them at the store. You need to have to have a reason to do that: their kid is in your kid's school, you know them from a party. Just seeing them at the gym and at the grocery store does not merit the advance to a verbal acknowledgment.
You have to stay in the eye contact and nod phase only. And it isn't it the worst when you think you see someone you know, and you have to dig down and remember their name and ask them to say hello to their wife and or husband and remember their name and then their kids names. And as soon as you have them all in your mind ready to go, it turns out that isn't the person you thought it was.
Don't they piss you off? Hey, pal, what the hell do you think you're doing not being the person I thought you were? I went to a lot of trouble to be pleasant and thoughtful to my friend and you fooled me. Go screw yourself, deceptive stranger.
Some observations on the documentary “Monterey Pop.” First of all, besides Otis Redding and Jimi Hendrix, if this festival represented the coolest of the cool, we weren’t all that cool in 1967. Even in the coolest of cool towns, Monterey. The hippie look was just a flat out bad one. And they took themselves so damn seriously.
But Ravi Shankar? Why on earth would Hindus believe in reincarnation if there was the slightest possibility they would have to hear that Sitar crap again? It makes progressive Jazz look downright military in its discipline. It is the closest music will ever get to capturing the sensation of being skinned alive. Both involve a lot of painful moaning of;
"My god, when will this be over?"
And Hendrix was so cool, but even that is hard to watch in terms of how drawn out and self-indulgent the act was. The lighting the guitar on fire was wild and all, but come on . . .
And, once again, it will take an awful lot of things going wrong at the same time to ever produce a more over-rated band than The Jefferson Airplane and I don’t believe there will ever be a performer more over-rated than Grace Slick. Not even Gene Simmons.
Lex’s Pet Peeve
Warning, this Pet Peeve is, like some O.C.D. traits, one you can catch.. Let me explain: my at-least-for-now-until-they-go-broke-like-my-other-radio-station I write for has a bit on OCD traits. The problem has been listeners catching them. Personally, I caught the one where you can’t touch anything with your hands in a public bathroom, you use paper towel mitts.
One of the listeners caught the have-to-count-all-the-birds-in-a-flock.
You could catch my new pet peeve: getting pissed at rude lazy-assed, selfish slobs who stroll away from their car and, instead of hitting the one-touch silent lock button on their key, they just shuffle away and blast the obnoxiously loud horn lock with me standing right next to their car. It is loud, lazy and obnoxious to blast the horn lock if someone is standing near the car.
I officially call them Rude, Lazy-assed Horn-lock Blowers or RLHB’s.