Saturday, March 08, 2014
Friday, March 07, 2014
Scientist have invented a machine that gives women orgasms with the touch of a button. Yeah, it's called an ATM.
posted by Alex at 10:01 AM
Thursday, March 06, 2014
The Phoney-Tough and the Crazy-Brave, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers
The NFL is considering different options to make the extra point more challenging. To which the Cleveland Browns said; “Wait, what’s an extra point?”
Russian President, Vladimir Putin, was nominated for a Nobel
Peace Prize; Putin is working on his acceptance speech where he will thank all
the people he murdered.
Things are tense between Ukraine and Russia, but Ukraine can’t
take comfort in the knowledge that, if Russia fights like they host the
Olympics, the battle will take over eight years to plan and even then it still
won’t be half finished.
Khloe Kardashian has bought Justin Bieber’s Calabasas, CA
mansion; eggs not included. Khloe likes it because it is one big-ass place.
The Los Angeles Clippers stomped the Los Angeles Lakers, 142 –
94. After the game, the Lakers were so stunned they pronounced their name as
the Los Adelle Dazeemers.
So far the only good news for Oscar Pistorius and his murder
trial is he didn’t have to post bail, he just had to hand over his prosthetics.
I'm starting to think Pistorius's alibi doesn't have a leg to stand on…
posted by Alex at 5:09 PM
Wednesday, March 05, 2014
"That is a substantive note, I will try and incorporate it," which is Hollywood for "Shut up the Eff up and let me do my job," Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers
Russian President, Vladimir Putin, was nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize; Putin could not comment as he was busy planning a war against the Ukraine.
Russian President, Vladimir Putin, was nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize; Putin could not comment as he was busy planning a war against the Ukraine.
posted by Alex at 1:06 PM
Tuesday, March 04, 2014
In order to create more room under the salary cap, the Dallas
Cowboys have dropped QB Tony Romo’s salary from $21.73 mil. to $11.73 mil. Romo
is lucky they dropped his salary, normally it would have been intercepted and
returned for a touchdown.
An 18-year-old New Jersey girl is suing her parents to pay for
her education; that is going to
make for an awkward mother’s day dinner in May. “Hey sweety, I mean Plaintiff. Would you like dessert, or
would you rather sue us for it?”
Reportedly the wealthy parents won't pay because they feel the daughter is unruly and spoiled. Gosh, what a lovely, lovely family, I do hope they can make it over for brunch on Sunday.
posted by Alex at 3:15 PM
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