Saturday, March 08, 2014


Friday, March 07, 2014

Scientist have invented a machine that gives women orgasms with the touch of a button. Yeah, it's called an ATM.

It is Wally's world, we're just living in it…

Dog sees Dad after being gone over 6 months

Thursday, March 06, 2014

The Phoney-Tough and the Crazy-Brave, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

The NFL is considering different options to make the extra point more challenging. To which the Cleveland Browns said; “Wait, what’s an extra point?”

Russian President, Vladimir Putin, was nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize; Putin is working on his acceptance speech where he will thank all the people he murdered.

Things are tense between Ukraine and Russia, but Ukraine can’t take comfort in the knowledge that, if Russia fights like they host the Olympics, the battle will take over eight years to plan and even then it still won’t be half finished.

Khloe Kardashian has bought Justin Bieber’s Calabasas, CA mansion; eggs not included. Khloe likes it because it is one big-ass place. 

The Los Angeles Clippers stomped the Los Angeles Lakers, 142 – 94. After the game, the Lakers were so stunned they pronounced their name as the Los Adelle Dazeemers.

So far the only good news for Oscar Pistorius and his murder trial is he didn’t have to post bail, he just had to hand over his prosthetics.
I'm starting to think Pistorius's alibi doesn't have a leg to stand on…

Wednesday, March 05, 2014

"That is a substantive note, I will try and incorporate it," which is Hollywood for "Shut up the Eff up and let me do my job," Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

Russian President, Vladimir Putin, was nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize; Putin could not comment as he was busy planning a war against the Ukraine.

Tuesday, March 04, 2014

In order to create more room under the salary cap, the Dallas Cowboys have dropped QB Tony Romo’s salary from $21.73 mil. to $11.73 mil. Romo is lucky they dropped his salary, normally it would have been intercepted and returned for a touchdown.

An 18-year-old New Jersey girl is suing her parents to pay for her education; that is going to make for an awkward mother’s day dinner in May. “Hey sweety, I mean Plaintiff. Would you like dessert, or would you rather sue us for it?”

Reportedly the wealthy parents won't pay because they feel the daughter is unruly and spoiled. Gosh, what a lovely, lovely family, I do hope they can make it over for brunch on Sunday.