We can bring it all day long, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers


In his speech to congress last night, President Barack Obama spoke 6,000 words.
He said America 58 times, economy 22 times, nation 19 times and oddly enough three times he mentioned the band Hoobastank.


In his speech to congress last night, President Barack Obama spoke 6,000 words.
He said America the most, 58 times, the economy 22 times, the nation 19 times and oddly enough he mentioned Hostess Twinkies twice.

President Barack Obama has been in office for 37 days.

That's one day for every bowling pin he can knock down.

Charles Barkley is going to jail for his DUI arrest.

Let's all hope Sir Charles isn't going to jail expecting the same thing he was expecting when he got the DUI.


In Barack Obama’s speech to Congress, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi leapt to her feet numerous times to applaud enthusiastically.
Of course with all of her face lifts, Nancy Pelosi always looks enthusiastic.


Tiger Woods is returning to golf this weekend after having knee surgery.
Tiger says he is excited to return because his legs feel strong, he missed the players on the tour but primarily Tiger is glad to be on tour because he has a screaming baby and a rambunctious toddler in his house.



After her appearance at a post-Oscar party, gossip is swirling that Madonna has had a lot of cosmetic work done.
Rumor has it Alex Rodriguez’s cousin injected Botox into her butt.

My daughter has a book of Presidential jokes or funny stories throughout our country’s history.

Sadly, the chapter for President George W. Bush is primarily knock-knock jokes.

My daughter has a book of Presidential jokes throughout our country’s history.

It was disturbing to discover the chapter on Bill Clinton was comprised primarily of limericks about Nantucket.

Barack Obama's family is trying to decide on a name for their soon-to-be First Dog.

It was a little awkward when his daughter's heard that dogs age seven times faster than humans they suggested the name McCain.

The First Family has decided on the breed of dog they will get: a Portuguese water dog.

They don’t shed, they have a good temperament and generally speaking their taxes are up to date.