They gotta wants
the schwanz, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers
The Tour de
France leader, Britain, Chris Froome, became upset at a press conference over
questions comparing him with drug-cheat, Lance Armstrong; wow, imagine how
upset he would have gotten over questions about how nobody gives a crap about
the Tour de France?
Comic-Con is in full swing in San Diego; good luck getting your
computer problem fixed.
A “New York Times” study claims today’s college women want sex
with instant gratification and no responsibilities; the conclusion of this
study is that I went to college at the wrong time.
Britain has approved same sex marriage; wait, I’m confused,
didn’t England already have same sex marriage? Aren’t Prince Charles and
Camilla Parker Bowles married?
San Diego Mayor, Bob Filner, refuses to resign despite numerous
sexual harassment charges. Yesterday Filner attended the opening day at the Del
Mar race track, but it didn’t go well. Filner
kept being mistaken for all the other horse’s asses.
Does everyone have Will and Kate Royal Baby Fever? It’s like
when Kanye and Kim’s baby was born except the parents aren’t classless, sleazy
Britain has approved same sex marriage; great news for Sir Elton
John, now the bitch is really back.
want an indication on how much talent there is in the comedy/acting world? How
about Jane Lynch? Blows people away in movies, TV, plays, musicals. And nobody
laid eyes on her until she stole the movie “Best in Show” at age 40. She had
about three lines in “The Fugitive” as a researcher. More talent than anyone
should ever have.
more I read William Goldman, the more he damns famous actors with feint praise.
Good to hear he thinks so much of Clint Eastwood and Gene Hackman. And Robin
Robin Wright married possibly the biggest a-hole in Hollywood in Sean Penn is
anybody’s guess. Not a huge fan of Madonna, but even she doesn’t deserve to get
tied up and beaten until bones broke, as Penn did to her. Oh, and he hit her
with a baseball bat.
past them on the track around the water reservoir in Central Park, circa 1982.
She was inconspicuous because she had just dyed her hair brown in her “Please
take me seriously as an actress” phase. They were both incredibly slow runners,
and short and slight. But my opinion of Penn was immediate: what a little
bitchy punk. No kidding, when I ran past them I wanted to reach over and slap
the sneer off Penn’s smug little face.
he looked epically hung-over.
actor who personifies everything Goldman hates is Dustin Hoffman. Serious case
of short-man’s disease – he may not be five feet tall – and a huge ego combined
with crippling insecurities. There is no amount of praise and compliments that
could fill the vast void that is the giant hole in Hoffman’s soul despite his
tiny, tiny body.
makes the movie industry so awful when it is awful, according to Goldman, is
the lying sleaze-balls that are the studio executives, and the explosive never-ending
neediness of the deeply insecure movie stars. Exceptions seem to be Paul Newman
– Redford is damned with no praise – Eastwood and Hackman.
– by his own admission – is abrasive and can’t stand fools. . (Bless his heart,
Goldman is an old-school North Shore boy from Winnetka’s neighbor, Highland
Park) And Goldman hates people who kiss ass almost as much as he hates people
who demand their asses get kissed. That puts Goldman on the wrong side of many,
many Hollywood types. Among the worst actors Goldman had to deal with were
Stallone, Eddie Murphy, Hoffman, Streisand, Steve McQueen, Val Kilmer, Michael
Douglass. (Believe it or not, he had nice things to say about Chevy Chase)
We all have love/hate relationships with big shot stars. We love it when they are good and good people, like Tom Hanks. But because we are kinda pissed off at how rich and famous they are, we love it when they turn out to be jerks.
Thing I like aboout Goldman is he admits he is like us. He wants to know what big shot movie star is a phony. Who lies about, A, their height, their age, who claims to be nice, but is really a jerk, and who is lying about their sexuality. Nobody really cares if an actor is gay or not. Look at Jane Lynch and Neil Patrick Harris. We want to know who the liars, fakers and hypocrites are.
example of Hollywood being a land of little people: Arnold Schwarzenegger is
considered a giant in Hollywood. He is maybe 6.0. (Know a person who spent the
day skiing with Arnold in Park City) Arnold thrived from being in two worlds
made up of midgets, body building and acting.
tall by Hollywood standards, Goldman, seemed to have learned through trial and error the shorter the
actor, the more difficult. One of the worst was Burt Reynolds. (Reynolds lists
his height at 5.10. According to insiders, that includes three inches of lifts
in his boots) This was confirmed by my aunt’s good friend who wrote many
successful screenplays. He told me Reynolds single-handedly destroyed a movie
he wrote with his ego/insecurities.
Letterman’s World Wide Pants production staff, specifically producer Rob
Burnett, mention Stallone and Reynolds repeatedly as the most difficult and
rudest guests they’ve ever dealt. And yet, Burnett was absolutely gob-smacked
when, during Dave’s bypass surgery, Reynolds tried to take advantage and asked
to guest host.
football career at Florida State grew with his acting fame. He was on the team,
there are pictures of him in uniform, but there is no evidence he received a
scholarship - as he claims - and he only played a few minutes in four games.
Just a few minutes of four games and Reynolds told people he seriously
considered a career in the NFL.
yet Reynolds was inducted into the Florida State Football Hall of Fame. His
lack of size and speed were cited as reasons his football career was so hilariously,
excuse me, short.
to Goldman and others, the main insecurities big-shot movie stars battle are
shortness, lack-of-formal education, no faith in their acting skills, baldness, drug and alcohol dependence, and
a desperate need to cover-up their particular sexual tendencies.
Reynolds, it seems you get all of those in one.