What we got to do is to do the do to you, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers
Hmm, who would have guessed?
They arrested another man in connection to the London bombings, Osman Hussain. Wonder how they suspected that guy? It couldn’t be because his name is Hussain, could it?Building a mystery
Now that Andre Agassi has switched his apparel sponsor from Nike to Adidas, you have to wonder what Nike will do with the Andre Agassi building at their campus headquarters? They could call it the Kobe Bryant building but good luck getting any food delivered.
They could call it the Lance Armstrong building but then they’d have to build a Crow’s nest.
They could name it the Andy Roddick building, but then it would always finish second to the Roger Federer building.Since you asked:
Shelly and Mugwump’s wedding.
What a great time. First class ballroom over-looking Mission Bay. Saw the fireworks from Sea World. Everything was first class and yet the mood was totally relaxed, fun and casual.
All week I was terrified of playing the harmonica with the top party band in San Diego, Inside Out, in front of the top radio show team in San Diego, “The Dave Shelly and Chainsaw Show” on KGB. But once I got there it suddenly hit me, these are just great people having a fun wedding. What’s to get nervous about?
Dinner was a fantastic fillet mignon with mushroom sauce and stuffed chicken and I had dinner with the band. We had a great time talking about “The Dave Shelly and Chainsaw” show as they are all really big fans. Shelly and her brand new husband Mugwumps (Mike) looked sharp in nice beach casual attire and then the band started playing dance tunes.
The crowd of 300 plus was the best I’ve ever seen. Everyone was dancing. At one point I asked the blonde one, Kim, of the two smoking hot female lead singers, who has sang in countless weddings, how she would rate this wedding. The words weren’t out of my mouth when she said; “A Ten. No question.” I have to disagree. You know how in “Spinal Tap” the guitarist has an amp that goes to 11 instead of ten? This wedding was an 11.
So I sat at the band’s dinner table talking to the band’s informal fan/manager/photographer/choreographer named Dana and suddenly the band started the chords to “The Romantiks” “What I Like About You.”
“Holy crap”, I said, “I have a solo on this.” Like someone avoiding a bail bondsman, I sprinted for the stage, opened my harmonica case, found my A harp, turned on my mike, turned around and it was time for my solo. It was perfect. I didn’t have time to think about it and it flowed out like I have never played before. In all modesty, the crowd went stinkin’ nuts.
Mark Murphy, the great lead singer, can play an audience like a fiddle, so he decides the time is perfect for my big Harmonica Jam; we titled the song in honor of Dave, the openly harmonica hating leader of “The DSC Show” recent and rare on air flubs. (Dave told Dan Akroyd he loved “Danny Boy” instead of “Tommy Boy” and he called Charger coach Marty Schotenheimer, Marty Schotenberg)
So naturally we called my solo “Danny Boy Schotenberg.” It ripped.
In the middle of my whaling-if-I-do-say-so riff, Mark hands me his cordless mike and sends me over to Dave’s table. Waltzing through the crowd while playing, I see Dave, and then, without missing a note, sit on his lap and play. Cameras were flashing like Tara Reid’s boob had popped out. Have to say Dave was a great sport about it.
After that the band jammed on Van Hagar’s “Right Now” and, quite frankly, they jammed every other song they did. They tore up AC/DC’s “All Night Long” They had a ripping saxophone player, Aaron, who could work the crowd into a frenzy. We dueled very nicely on “Mustang Sally” trading riffs back and forth.
But the highlight for me was how we killed on the Stones “Honky Tonk Woman.” A having-too-much-fun groom, Mugwumps (Mike) went ballistic dancing and singing right in front of us. That was a great feeling.
This one particularly tall and attractive woman came up and said “I love your harmonica.” When I told her thanks, she said; “When I hear harmonica like that my clothes peel off.” I said; “Wait here, I’ll get my harmonicas.”
It was so surreal and wonderful to finally meet these people and get to know them after listening and writing to them as “Listener Lex” for so long. Bromo, Ruth 66 were really fun and the awesome dirty dancing Chucko and her cool boyfriend were a blast as well as the sweet Emily J. McGuire. Everyone was great.
But the best part was at the end. I walked out to the elevator and there was Dave’s smokin’ hot girlfriend, Nicole. Man, she is strikingly beautiful and so much fun. She danced like a sexy wild woman all night. Dave came over and we all got into the elevator, he gave me a smile and said;
“You were great.”
Sell my shoes, I’m going to heaven.
As I said goodnight to Dave and Nicole –as I now call them - and turned to go outside, Dave whispered something to Nicole and she screamed out; “That’s Listener Lex”? She ran over, gave me a hug the whole while extolling my comedic writing abilities. I think I said something like; “This is the greatest moment of my life.” Dave laughed and rolled his eyes at his wonderfully carrying-on and beautiful date.
Once out in the cool yet oddly balmy night, I was so pumped, so jazzed, so fired up I had to get a drink at the bar before grabbing a long cab ride home. (My lovely wife and daughter had dropped me off) Sitting there at the bar with my Kettle One and tonic, my brain was flying. It was like I had just been in a great dream except that it had really happened. Comedy writing and harmonica playing had just blended together at this amazing wedding party with a ripping band. Met a whole bunch of great people and just had a real blast. It was my perfect storm.
In short, I picked a great night not to suck.