Saturday, June 29, 2019


View outside my apartment tonight. NTS. Not too shabby. (Just saw "Cedar Rapids")



There I was, minding my own bidness, walking Wally across the apartment parking lot when a tall blonde woman walks in front of us with her groceries. 

Her legs were so freakishly long,  I could not stop staring like a 7th grader with pitching a circus in his pants. My brain turned into a hard-boiled, LA detective paperback:

“Something told me this dame was trouble. Her gams went from here-to-there and back again. Real getaway sticks, see?”

Just then, I hear a car door slam and I see her husband/boyfriend get out of the car. He is clearly a military officer and he has a knowing smile on his face. 

As he walks passed me, I have no choice but to say, 

“Busted.” He says, 

“Totally.” 





*****


Still getting feedback on my piece on here years ago connecting Charles Manson with the 1968 LA music scene. Good and bad.

How is this? Phil Kaufman was Graham Parson’s manager, Parsons being the guy who taught Eric Clapton, Keith Richards, Led Zeppelin and Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young about country music.

Kaufman taught Charles Manson how to play guitar in prison.


https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phil_Kaufman_(producer)




Friday, June 28, 2019

Operator - Jim Croce

Monday, June 24, 2019

 Andrew "Dice" Clay and Roseanne Bar are going on the "Mr. and Mrs America" tour. 

They decided to tour after they got together and had a meeting of the mind.






Andrew "Dice" Clay and Roseanne Bar are going on the "Mr. and Mrs America" tour. 

"There is no doubt I want to see that great lineup," said 1987.





My back goes out so much, I am not sure I can call it out anymore. If it ever goes back in, I will let you know.






After watching HBO's "Chernobyl," Donald Trump said he was surprised to find out the nuclear plant explosion was caused by Barack Obama.









Rappers Cardi B, Migos, Lil Yachty and XStankZuzu performed in L.A.

Be honest, how many did not know I just made up XStankZuzu?







Julia Hawkins became the oldest woman to compete in a track meet running the 100 meters.

Yesterday, I watched an entire informercial on estate taxes because I did not want to stand up and get the remote.












In the Women's World Cup, the US faces France on Friday.

Normally this is when I would make a snotty, xenophobic joke about the French surrendering, but the bravery exhibited by the French in terrorist attacks - excuse the ironic expression - trumps that.








The Irish woman, who last year married a 300-year-old pirate ghost named Jack, announced they were breaking up.

They never had sex. Or as she put it, they never hooked-up.








Andrew "Dice" Clay and Roseanne Bar are going on the "Mr. and Mrs America" tour. America is suing for defamation.

It should be called "The Low Barr" comedy tour.









The Irish woman, who last year married a 300-year-old pirate ghost named Jack, announced they were breaking up.

Jack the pirate ghost wants to start seeing other crazy women.






Hand her an invoice listing your labor charges #WorstThingToDoAfterSex





In the Women's World Cup, the US beat Spain 2-1 in a game with negligent foul calling by the refs. In fact, the refs were so bad, the NBA might hire them.






The Irish woman, who last year married a 300-year-old pirate ghost named Jack, announced they were breaking up.

Living with a pirate ghost just got to be too harrrrrrrrrrrrrrd.