Friday, October 19, 2012

Charlie Brown Christmas Segment - Snoopy Dancing

Thursday, October 18, 2012

This just in: The first porn star, Sylvia Kristel, passed at 60; Bill Clinton wearing his pants at half-mast.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

This here the latest picture of Wally the P. Walter Payton Kaseberg his own self. 

This just in: Bill Clinton announces he wants to go on a bender with Mitt's binder. 

Excited young man to older Chinese man:

"Hey, check it out, I just got a tattoo on my arm in Chinese. It says Brave Warrior."

Older Chinese guy:

"No, it say; "When two men have sex, you are the woman." 

Since you asked:
Let's be clear. The last thing Nike dumping Lance Armstrong is about is doping.

You can call the evil egomaniacs at Nike a lot of things, but stupid isn't one of them. They knew that their top shelf athletes, from Carl  Lewis to Bo Jackson to Tiger Woods, were on performance enhancing drugs. They would have to be stupid not to. 

Nike is about one thing: money. Lance Armstrong's plummet in popularity caused a complete cut off in his ad income. Period. 

Nike doesn't care about rapists - Ben Roethlisberger and Kobe Bryant - they don't care about abusing child labor in Asia, they don't care about dog fighters - Michael Vick. They don't care about soulless philandering a-holes - Tiger Woods. They certainly don't care about doping. 

They only care about money. 

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Oh, Zull-y, you nut, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

Dear "Breaking Bad";

Shut up. Just shut up. You had me at 50-something-white-guy-in-tightie-whities-and-a-gas-mask-careening-down-mountain-road-in-a-crappy-RV-meth-lab-filled-with-sewage-acid-and-two-bodies.

My life has been hijacked by this damn show. Whoever did this to me, I want them to start pooping me Tiffany cufflinks or I will have them standing tall before the man. Do you read me? Outstanding.


Dear Mr. Mister:

One broken wing and a lot of luck and maybe that bird flies again. But two broken wings? Plural? That bird is a pedestrian. Kiwis will fly before that thing does. 

Just being candid.


Dear Nike:

Your hypocrisy continues to know no bounds. You dump Lance Armstrong for "doping" yet you keep a known steroid cheat, Alex Rodriguez, in your stable of whores.

Part of it is Lance's fault for being dumped by Nike. Instead of getting caught doping, he should have sexually assaulted women or killed puppies, like Ben Roethlisberger and Michael Vick. Nike kept them. 


Monday, October 15, 2012

Anthony Vela Stand Up Paddle Elite Racer

Just saw "Legends of Laurel Canyon" so you don't have to. You're welcome.

Mostly just a fluff piece on who lived where. Stayed away from the entire drugs and sex scene, although several of the in-crowd said the nudity at parties was much more of a hippy/Zen yoga thing than an orgy. 

Didn't realize the band "Love" was so influential especially to Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young. And Frank Zappa was considered a genius/god to the musicians. You could really sense a stance between the Artist musicians versus the solidification of everything in music they considered evil: The Monkees.

Many bands, including the Doors to an extent, took such a strong stance against selling out they ruined their careers.  The band Love being a good example. 

The real cocaine and orgy crowd was a very exclusive and small crowd. They could fit into one big party house at a time and they did a few weeks before Manson tried to have them all killed. Steve McQueen, Warren Beatty - although Beatty didn't do drugs - Stephen Stills, David Crosby, John Phillips, Mick Jagger. The woman in this crowd were Bridget Bardot, Jane Fonda, Candice Bergman, and Sharon Tate.

The genius of this movable orgy was being able to convince beautiful women that having sex with lots of different people was cool. 

Even then many of the players drew the line, some did drugs but didn't cheat on their wives/girlfriends, others, like Beatty, just hung for the sex. Keith Richards never cheated on his girlfriend/wife at all. Neither did Clapton. 

Some of the Laurel Canyon four-tool-guy players - sex, coke, acid, booze - were McQueen, Browne, Stills, Phillips, Dolenz, Crosby, Jagger, Jimmy Page to name a few. 

The other thing that stuck out was that, to a person, they all didn't think they were experiencing such a revolutionary scene at the time. If you're at a party in Laurel Canyon where John Lennon strolls in and jams with Eric Clapton with Brian Wilson on the piano, so be it. Looking back on it makes it a much bigger deal.

Monkee Mickey Dolenze was a key figure at this scene and actually taped some of these jams and he refuses to let them go public. Why? Because they weren't any good. Even if they are legendary rock and roll figures, a bunch of effed-up guys making up songs at a party sucks. 

The Byrds and Bachman, Turner Overdrive wrote a song about picking up a used guitar, take some time and learn how to play, chances are you'll go far. 

Yes and no. 

Many amazingly talented bands did not take off. Love, Grass Roots, the Flying Burrito Brothers and to less of an extent, Poco.