Wednesday, August 21, 2019

ESPN’s next commercial:

Two ESPN announcers (John Anderson, Matt Barrie) walking down the hall:


“No, it is a real thing. It’s called Doggy Tourettes Syndrome. Some people, when they see a cute dog, cannot control the baby talk and drivel that comes out of their mouth.”

(They come upon Scott Van Pelt petting Chomps, the Cleveland Browns mascot)

Scott Van Pelt in a high pitched voice:

“Whoses was a goods boys, yes you was my widdle monkey bumps. Are you my widdle monkey bumps? Yes you wases my widdle monkey bumps.”


“Monkey bumps?”


"That was hard to see."

Monday, August 19, 2019

Today was nickname day on MLB jerseys. If there was any truth to nickname day, the 37-84 Detroit Tigers would have "They Suck" on their jersey.

Sunday, August 18, 2019

Mike Tyson said he smokes $40,000 worth of pot a month.

This finally explains why he bit off Evander Holyfield's ear, he had the munchies.