Friday, January 24, 2020

Mr. Peanut has died.

It's just as well, he has been shell of his former self.

The earthquake in Los Angeles was pretty serious. It actually shook somebody into a L.A. Chargers gift shop.

New York Yankee, Derek Jeter, was voted into the Hall of Fame 396-1.

In a related story, the one dissenting voter was elected unanimously into the Useless Moron Hall of Fame.

An English tourist lost his foot to a shark attack while snorkeling in Australia.

He was going to sue the Australian tourist board, but his case didn't have a leg to stand on.

The Super Bowl is the Kansas City Chiefs versus the San Francisco Forty Niners. 

Here is what is both cities have in common: their teams wear red. That's it.

Not really sure how this is even possible, but I think the Houston Astros just stole my WiFi signal.