We all of that and a side-o-biscuits, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers


Now if she could just lose the rest of her
*Anna Nicole Smith has lost 80 pounds. The last time Anna Nicole lost 80 pounds was when she buried her 89-year-old husband J. Howard Marshall.

Yep Anna Nicole lost 80 pounds. And no, we don’t mean she can’t find her son.

You know how Anna Nicole lost so much weight? She went on the Webster diet: she can’t eat anything she can’t spell.

Duh. He’s called a Prince and he lives with his Mommy
*I guess you all heard those rumors about Prince Charles, the rumors of the homosexual affair. If it’s true, I am starting to finally get the whole Camille Parker Bowles-thing.

Who cares if Prince Charles is gay? It just doesn’t matter, if Charles is gay it doesn’t effect his ability to, um . . . what the hell does that guy do, anyway?

Do you think Charles is gay? I sure can't tell. It's that stupid English accent; they all sound gay to me.

I just want to hear her say Master
*And Jessica Simpson is reportedly up for the role in the movie version of "I dream of Jeannie.” For her first trick as a Jeannie, Jessica is going to turn tuna into chicken.

Criminal neglect
*Men’s Journal has listed the top fifty Guy movies. It includes “Caddy Shack”, “The Godfather”, “Terminator”, “The Dirty Dozen.” If you ask me it was shameful how they slighted; “Under the Tuscan Sun.”

I haven’t seen the entire top guy movie list, but I am willing to bet “Beaches” isn’t very high.

Brock Stocker
*Here’s something interesting, discount broker guru Charles Schwab. He revealed this week he is dyslexic. That’s bad news for you folks who have your money at Schwab. You thought you had a stockbroker? Turns out you got a broke stocker. A bunch of poor grocery-clerk guys.

Ten items or less
The grocery store workers are still out on strike. It has been so long, the substitute grocery bagger’s are actually starting to understand the difference between paper and plastic.

Here’s Johnny
*Christian Slater received 20 stitches for a gash to his head after his wife hit him with a glass. Apparently she snapped, threw the glass and screamed; “Stop imitating Jack Nicholson.”

A geologist believes that, two hundred million years ago, methane gas releases nearly caused the end of the world. I don’t know about the end of the world, but methane gas releases sure have caused the end of many of our "A Little Bit Bad *editor meetings.

*Anyone who has ever read this blog knows that the real joke is that there is obviously no editor involved anywhere in this process.

Since you asked;
Have you noticed that articles about comedy are always written by people with apparently no sense of humor at all? It is also true that the people who feel the most justified in harshly criticizing humor have no sense of it in the first place. And that isn’t just directed at the bitter tools who don’t like my stuff.

But the other day I was reading an article analyzing humor. The old adage is true: Humor is like a frog, once you dissect it, it’s dead. But this dork who wrote this article concluded that there is no great comedy without pain. That may or may not be true, but I can tell you this from personal experience: hitting yourself in the testicles will not make you any funnier.

And that is today's deep comedy thought. (Polite applause)