Saturday, April 04, 2009

Give a holla when yah see a playa on the street, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

Crime and punishment
Former Ill Gov Rod Blagojevich was indicted on 16 counts including fraud, extortion, racketeering and the lesser charge of hair gel and foam mousse abuse.

Coming soon, if you know what I mean . . .
Singer Elvis Crespo was accused by a fellow passenger of masturbating on a flight from Houston to Miami. Look for Crespo’s next single, a remake of Eric Clapton’s “Hand Jive.”

Times have changed
In Illinois a 24-year-old teacher was arrested for having sex with her 16-year-old male student. When I was in high school, I got sent to detention for trying to park my car in my teacher’s spot.

Oh please
French President Nicolas Sarkozy has threatened to walk out of the G20 conference if tighter banking controls are not issued. Oh please, Dude, if you want to sneak out and have sex with your hot wife, Carla Bruni, just do it, don’t make lame excuses.

A little French guy quitting and running away? Mon Dieu, who has ever heard of such a thing?

Of course they did
Singer Elvis Crespo was accused by a fellow passenger of masturbating on a flight from Houston to Miami. When the airline found out, they charged Crespo a special $100 self-exploration fee.

Oh please, cut me a slice of that
A French pole vaulter, who lost his Nike sponsorship, is trying to attract new sponsors by running naked with a pole vault pole through the streets of Paris. Can you imagine? A naked muscular guy running with a long pole in his hand? Or as Richard Simmons calls that: Heaven.

My guess
Until he is reinstated to the NFL, former imprisoned dog fighter, Michael Vick, will have to get a job to fulfill his parole terms. For now I am guessing pet groomer and dog walker are out.

Since you asked:

"Sports Illustrated" stated that PETA has protest and boycott plans for Michael Vick including demanding he take a test to see if he is mentally stable.

Only PETA could be so annoying they could make a convicted dog fighter sympathetic. Look, I don't want Vick on the Bears or the Chargers, but the guy did do his time. Vick and his conscience - if in fact he has one - have to grapple with how he made innocent dogs suffer and die, but Vick has paid his debt to society and he now has the right to try and redeem himself as well as make a living.