Bring it on home, bring it on home to you, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers
What’s the difference between Jay Leno and President Bush? Leno has a job next year*.
Avast there me hearties
It has been a rough week for pirates, the Oakland Raiders and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers lost, the Somali pirates got outrun by a luxury cruiser and the three auto presidents don’t have their bailout yet.
The Oakland Raiders and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers lost, the Somali pirates got outrun by a luxury cruiser. No doubt about it, for pirates these are harrrrrrd times.
Uh, no Jessica, oh forget it
The Cowboy game in Pittsburgh was so cold, Dallas QB Tony Romo may have experienced mild hypothermia. It was embarrassing, when informed that Romo had experienced hypothermia, Jessica Simpson said; “But he told me he was straight.”
Seems about right
The judge who sentenced OJ Simpson, Jackie Glass, told Simpson he was arrogant and ignorant; but OJ didn’t care nor did he really understand.
Also seems about right
The NFL playoffs picture is getting set. In the NFC Central division, it looks like the 8-5 Minnesota Vikings are going into the playoffs and the 0-13 Detroit Lions are going into therapy.
Time is counting down
President Bush attended the 109th Army-Navy game Saturday; there was an awkward moment when the first half ended and Bush proclaimed: “Mission accomplished.”
Oops
Two-time beach volleyball gold medalist, Kerri Walsh, announced she is expecting with a child conceived the night she won in Beijing; sadly, this was not the best news for Walsh’s husband as he did not make the trip to Beijing.
Two-time beach volleyball gold medalist, Kerri Walsh, announced she is expecting with a child conceived the night she won in Beijing; I’m telling you, that Michael Phelps was one busy guy.
Except for then
A UC San Diego study claims that other people’s happiness – even strangers – is contagious. You get happier simply by being around happy people. The notable exception? Your ex-spouse wins the lottery.
Since you asked:
*Could I please have a nice steaming hot bowl of Wow soup? Talk about a solution that is so obvious you couldn’t see it, NBC is giving Leno the 10:00 PM spot five days a week. Man, NBC sure pulled their fat out of the fire. In my earlier brilliant and insightful (cough) assessment of this solution, the only option I could see was ABC’s 11:30. This NBC 10:00 is better than that for just about everybody concerned.
Good sources tell me nothing is certain about the new Leno show but that it will have a monologue which is sort of good news for me assuming they keep their freelance contributors. And why wouldn't they? Don't answer that.
This is a good move. Leno will get more of his demographic viewers with the earlier time slot and keep all the people who continue to record his show in a DVR/Tivo device.
The late night talk shows are the primary ratings benefactor in the digital recording age. The earlier shows people can watch on their own without much inconvenience, but the late shows need to be recorded because many people can’t stay up.
And there is the element of the timeliness of the topical monologue - and guests - that creates more of an urgency to watch the talk shows than any other recording. If “Gone with the Wind” comes on at midnight you can tape it -sorry, record it, showing my age here -, but there is no reason you need to watch it right away. It is still going to be “Gone with the Wind.” Whereas the jokes in a monologue get dated rather quickly so they require more punctual viewing.
Now there is nothing for me to do but continue to write top notch (cough) comedy and wait for the bonus check that Leno often, but not always, but I am sure he will this year, sends to the more prolific freelance contributors. (Cough) Must be allergies.
(Cue: polite applause swelling to thunderous ovation)
What’s the difference between Jay Leno and President Bush? Leno has a job next year*.
Avast there me hearties
It has been a rough week for pirates, the Oakland Raiders and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers lost, the Somali pirates got outrun by a luxury cruiser and the three auto presidents don’t have their bailout yet.
The Oakland Raiders and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers lost, the Somali pirates got outrun by a luxury cruiser. No doubt about it, for pirates these are harrrrrrd times.
Uh, no Jessica, oh forget it
The Cowboy game in Pittsburgh was so cold, Dallas QB Tony Romo may have experienced mild hypothermia. It was embarrassing, when informed that Romo had experienced hypothermia, Jessica Simpson said; “But he told me he was straight.”
Seems about right
The judge who sentenced OJ Simpson, Jackie Glass, told Simpson he was arrogant and ignorant; but OJ didn’t care nor did he really understand.
Also seems about right
The NFL playoffs picture is getting set. In the NFC Central division, it looks like the 8-5 Minnesota Vikings are going into the playoffs and the 0-13 Detroit Lions are going into therapy.
Time is counting down
President Bush attended the 109th Army-Navy game Saturday; there was an awkward moment when the first half ended and Bush proclaimed: “Mission accomplished.”
Oops
Two-time beach volleyball gold medalist, Kerri Walsh, announced she is expecting with a child conceived the night she won in Beijing; sadly, this was not the best news for Walsh’s husband as he did not make the trip to Beijing.
Two-time beach volleyball gold medalist, Kerri Walsh, announced she is expecting with a child conceived the night she won in Beijing; I’m telling you, that Michael Phelps was one busy guy.
Except for then
A UC San Diego study claims that other people’s happiness – even strangers – is contagious. You get happier simply by being around happy people. The notable exception? Your ex-spouse wins the lottery.
Since you asked:
*Could I please have a nice steaming hot bowl of Wow soup? Talk about a solution that is so obvious you couldn’t see it, NBC is giving Leno the 10:00 PM spot five days a week. Man, NBC sure pulled their fat out of the fire. In my earlier brilliant and insightful (cough) assessment of this solution, the only option I could see was ABC’s 11:30. This NBC 10:00 is better than that for just about everybody concerned.
Good sources tell me nothing is certain about the new Leno show but that it will have a monologue which is sort of good news for me assuming they keep their freelance contributors. And why wouldn't they? Don't answer that.
This is a good move. Leno will get more of his demographic viewers with the earlier time slot and keep all the people who continue to record his show in a DVR/Tivo device.
The late night talk shows are the primary ratings benefactor in the digital recording age. The earlier shows people can watch on their own without much inconvenience, but the late shows need to be recorded because many people can’t stay up.
And there is the element of the timeliness of the topical monologue - and guests - that creates more of an urgency to watch the talk shows than any other recording. If “Gone with the Wind” comes on at midnight you can tape it -sorry, record it, showing my age here -, but there is no reason you need to watch it right away. It is still going to be “Gone with the Wind.” Whereas the jokes in a monologue get dated rather quickly so they require more punctual viewing.
Now there is nothing for me to do but continue to write top notch (cough) comedy and wait for the bonus check that Leno often, but not always, but I am sure he will this year, sends to the more prolific freelance contributors. (Cough) Must be allergies.
(Cue: polite applause swelling to thunderous ovation)
posted by Alex at
11:49 AM
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