Step off wit’ your good foot and have a nice day, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers
That sounds about right
A survey reveals that 67% of people polled said they hate Paris Hilton; the other 23% didn’t like Paris, but they did enjoy having sex with her.
Long time gone
According to archaeologists, Rice was first eaten 10,000 years ago. And it was twenty years ago since Condoleezza Rice was eaten.
Except then
The two scientists who invented the technology that produced the iPod were given a Nobel Prize. With the noted exception of when the iPod plays Coldplay.
Say it ain’t so, Joe
The Association of Tennis Professionals is investigating allegations of thrown matches; man, first baseball has a steroid scandal, then the NBA had a corrupt ref, then the New England Patriots get caught spying. Next thing you know they are going to accuse pro wrestling of being rigged.
Not so fast
A new survey found that the country with the highest number of contented citizens in the world is Mexico. But keep in mind this survey was taken before we gave them a Taco Bell.
Not good
The Association of Tennis Professionals is investigating allegations of thrown matches; man, first baseball has a steroid scandal, then the NBA has corrupt refs, then the New England Patriots get caught spying. Things are bad when Don King is the most credible person in sports.
You chose
Border agents are shooting pepper balls at illegal immigrants coming in from Mexico; for those who prefer their illegal immigrants savory but less spicy, agents will shoot rock salt instead.
Not a good combo
Coors and Miller are combining their U.S. brewing operations. Budweiser and Schlitz were going to combine until they realized that together it would form Blitzed.
Uh, no Sir, that’s not, oh forget it
Al Gore received the Nobel Peace Prize for his fight against global warming; I still don’t think President Bush gets it, when informed Gore won the Nobel prize, Bush said;
“Explain again why he gets a prize for not having a bell?”
Coors and Miller are combining their U.S. brewing operations. Old Style and Heineken were going to merge until they realized it would form Old Heinie.
Moosehead and Schlitz were going to merge until they realized it would form Mooseschlitz.
We kid the folks in Arkansas
A survey asked what people would do if they only had one hour to live. Most people said they would spend it with their family, a small percentage said they would spend it having sex and the people polled in Arkansas said they would spend it having sex with their family.
That sounds about right
A survey reveals that 67% of people polled said they hate Paris Hilton; the other 23% didn’t like Paris, but they did enjoy having sex with her.
Long time gone
According to archaeologists, Rice was first eaten 10,000 years ago. And it was twenty years ago since Condoleezza Rice was eaten.
Except then
The two scientists who invented the technology that produced the iPod were given a Nobel Prize. With the noted exception of when the iPod plays Coldplay.
Say it ain’t so, Joe
The Association of Tennis Professionals is investigating allegations of thrown matches; man, first baseball has a steroid scandal, then the NBA had a corrupt ref, then the New England Patriots get caught spying. Next thing you know they are going to accuse pro wrestling of being rigged.
Not so fast
A new survey found that the country with the highest number of contented citizens in the world is Mexico. But keep in mind this survey was taken before we gave them a Taco Bell.
Not good
The Association of Tennis Professionals is investigating allegations of thrown matches; man, first baseball has a steroid scandal, then the NBA has corrupt refs, then the New England Patriots get caught spying. Things are bad when Don King is the most credible person in sports.
You chose
Border agents are shooting pepper balls at illegal immigrants coming in from Mexico; for those who prefer their illegal immigrants savory but less spicy, agents will shoot rock salt instead.
Not a good combo
Coors and Miller are combining their U.S. brewing operations. Budweiser and Schlitz were going to combine until they realized that together it would form Blitzed.
Uh, no Sir, that’s not, oh forget it
Al Gore received the Nobel Peace Prize for his fight against global warming; I still don’t think President Bush gets it, when informed Gore won the Nobel prize, Bush said;
“Explain again why he gets a prize for not having a bell?”
Coors and Miller are combining their U.S. brewing operations. Old Style and Heineken were going to merge until they realized it would form Old Heinie.
Moosehead and Schlitz were going to merge until they realized it would form Mooseschlitz.
We kid the folks in Arkansas
A survey asked what people would do if they only had one hour to live. Most people said they would spend it with their family, a small percentage said they would spend it having sex and the people polled in Arkansas said they would spend it having sex with their family.
posted by Alex at
10:13 AM
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