What? What? What? It ain’t nothing but a thang, thang, thang, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

This may be over the line
Speaking at Columbia, Iran’s President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad said there are no homosexuals in Iran; yeah right, what about Ahamdinejad’s male prostitute cousin, Ahmadidablowjob?

Metamucil Sunrise
The Eagles are coming out with a new album. You can tell they’re getting a little older, it’s a sequel to “Hotel California” titled “Assisted Care Facility California.”

It depends where the brains are
In medical news, an Australian became the first man to remain conscience and talk during brain surgery; if you don’t count the time Tom Arnold yammered all through his procedure to remove rectal polyps.

Police in Alabama arrested a 62-year-old grandmother for prostitution; She was arrested working a convention for fans of “Murder She Wrote.”

Or something like that
“Twenty Four” star Kiefer Sutherland was arrested for a DUI. His blood alcohol was so high they are going to call his show “Point Twenty Four.”