We play callin’ and hard ballin’ and load haulin’, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

I can’t wait. Oh yes, I can
The Tour De France begins tomorrow. And to think I thought I didn't care about Wimbledon.

Blah, blah, blah
A U. of Arizona study reveals that women speak 16,215 words a day versus 15,669 for men, a mere 500 more words for women. The problem for men is those 500 more words include: “We have to talk”; “Take out the garbage” and “If you think you’re watching sports all day you’ve got another thing coming.”

The subject who spoke the most was a man who spoke over 45,000 words in one day. To be fair, he was explaining a phone number his wife found in his pants on a bar coaster.

Nous plaisantons seulement avec le français odeure et impoli
The Tour De France begins tomorrow. What used to be of vital international importance has, through scandals and mismanagement, dwindled down to an unimportant punch line to a bad joke. And besides France, the Tour has fallen on hard times as well.

NBA finals MVP, Tony Parker is marrying “Desperate Housewives” co-star Eva Longoria in France tomorrow. It will be a traditional French wedding including a French cake, French wine, and after the ceremony, the couple surrenders to the German army.

The Tour De France begins tomorrow. Without a contender, this year Americans are going to treat the Tour De France just like France treated World War II. We’ll sit this one out and you tell us who wins.