Friday, May 12, 2006

It is hard out here

It gonna go that way today, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

Tough job
“The West Wing” is getting dumped, “Commander in Chief’ was dropped. Apparently it is much more difficult to be a fake good president than it is to be a real bad one.

Suck that gut in, David
There was talk of making a movie out of the talking car TV show “Knight Rider.” But it would have been too expensive to make; they couldn’t afford to fill the Kitt car up with gas.

I think the first thing the Kitt car says in the movie “Knight Rider” is “What the hell happened to the price of gas?”

You remember “Knight Rider”? That was the eighties show that proved even a car could act better than David Hasselhof.

There was talk of making a movie out of the talking car TV show “Knight Rider.” That was the show that featured a car that talked to the driver. As opposed to Patrick Kennedy who had a car that screamed at the driver; “N000000!”

Which part don’t you understand, the buh or the bye?
Disney is dumping their sponsorship deal with McDonalds. Disney figured they had to dump McDonalds when kids got so fat they had to put up signs with hands four feet apart saying; “You must be thinner than this to ride this ride.”

Doctor’s orders
Keith Richards was released from the hospital and is doing much better; but Keith is under strict doctor’s orders, if he wants to climb a tree he has to use an electric Rascal tree climber.

Good idea
The movie “Poseidon” has debuted. It is about a luxurious vessel that suddenly gets turned upside down and sinks. They got the idea from watching the Los Angeles Lakers in the playoffs.

No surprise there
A poll reveals that Tom Cruise’s popularity has dropped way off with women. Apparently women didn’t like it when Tom went from faking to like all women to faking to like only one.

Might have something there
The economy is so bad in Palestine, they’re gas stations are running out of gasoline; on the bright side, I think we just figured out how to stop car bombing.

What are the odds?
Honestly it is so great that Keith Richards is fine. After all he has been through, losing Keith Richards to a tree climbing accident would seem as likely as President Bush joining Mensa.

Idol shocker
They kicked that bald rocker fan favorite, Chris, off of “American Idol.” That was so shocking Keith Richards nearly fell out of his cocoanut tree again.
Be considerate
You know what is really annoying? People who leave their cell phone number on a message so fast you have to listen to the message over and over to get it. The National Security Association and President Bush just hate that. Leave your number slowly.  

Pet update:

This morning when I bent over to scoop out Wrigley’s two cups of dog food from the bin, guess who stuck is cute dumb head right in between my legs to better observe? No, not Ryan Seacrest. That’s right, I look down and there is this fuzzy white hound doggy Wrigley face sticking out from my crotch.

What a knucklehead that dog is.

Oh, and I have been remiss in totaling the number of pets we have. We have three. Kasey, Wrigley and Manchester. You have to include the Beta fish, Manchester, Ann Caroline got at Christmas. Yes, he is alive and well. Ann Caroline will make a fine vet after all.