Monday, May 08, 2006

It is hard out here

We gonna do right by the do right do, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

In the spirit
Happy Cinco De Mayo, Rep. Patrick Kennedy celebrated by driving into a Piñata.

Should be crazy
I’ve got a wild weekend coming up; I am going on a road trip with Rep. Patrick Kennedy to go cocoanut picking with Keith Richards.

Good news, bad news
Good news, Keith Richards was released from the New Zealand hospital for a mild concussion and will fly to his home in Connecticut; the bad news, Richards will be picked up at the airport by Rep. Patrick Kennedy.

Not positive
O.J. Simpson is at the Kentucky Derby; apparently O.J. is betting a lot of money on a horse with 50-1 odds; at least I hope that’s what OJ means when he said he wants to make a killing.

Why not name him after a lawyer?
One of the favorites for Saturday’s Kentucky Derby is a horse named Lawyer Ron. Why did they name the race horse after a Lawyer? Because, like a lawyer, he goes around in circles, costs millions, relieves himself wherever he wants then leaves it for others to clean up.

In Washington, Rep. Patrick Kennedy, son of Senator Ted Kennedy, crashed his car and appeared drunk, according to an officer, but he was not charged. When he called his father and asked; “What do I do if they arrest me?” Ted said; “We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.”

Rep. Patrick Kennedy, son of Senator Ted Kennedy, crashed his car, appeared drunk, according to an officer, but he was not charged, in fact, the Capital police drove him home. But they claim Kennedy did not get preferential treatment. For example the police did not tuck him into bed.

This guy’s last name is anything but Kennedy, he’s asking Jack Abramof if he wants the top or bottom jail cell bunk.

Tough to get a ticket
With every Hollywood big shot trying to go, you know why the potential upcoming Lakers-Clippers playoffs are like a drunk driving Kennedy? It’s virtually impossible to get a ticket.

That time of year
Prom season is underway. It’s a nerve wracking time for Florida High School boys. They don’t know whether to ask their English teacher or their Art teacher to go to the prom.

My memories of my high school Prom are mixed. On the one hand it was a beautiful and exciting night in a tuxedo, on the other hand, the teacher I went with didn’t put out.

USC quarterback Matt Leinart is dating Paris Hilton; it is kind of embarrassing, Paris is dating Leinart because, when she heard he is a Trojan, Parish thought he could get her free condoms.