In a one horse open sleigh-izzle, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers
Merry, merry
A study in the “Journal of American Medical Association” reveals that terminally ill patients do not try and hang on through the Holidays. And if that cheery little story doesn’t get you in the Christmas spirit, nothing will.
Old habits die hard
I’m a sentimental guy during the Holidays, I like to stick with tradition and do the same things each year. For example, it just doesn’t feel like time to shop for presents until the clerk at the Seven Eleven yells: “Would you buy something? I have to close and go home for Christmas.”
Not the same
You know what gets me in the mood for Christmas? Christmas movies. But I have to admit, the one I rented was different then what I expected. Don’t confuse “Miracle on 34th street” with the more adult-rated “$100 Miracle on 42nd Street.”
And don’t confuse the classic “A Christmas Carol” with the Hustler video store version; “A Christmas Carol, Tiffany, Amber and Brandi.”
One bad actor
At the Robert Blake trial, a doctor testified he thought Robert Blake was insincere when he called out that his wife was shot. How bad of an actor are you when you can’t act like your wife is shot after you just shot her?
Imagine that?
In response to Shaquille O’Neal saying he was a brick wall and Kobe Bryant was a Corvette, Kobe replied that now that he is 230 pounds, he’s a combination Corvette and Hummer. After saying the word Hummer, Kobe then had an uncontrollable urge to order room service.
Since you asked:
Rented "Bourne Supremacy" last night. Just OK. One kept getting the feeling, due to Matt Damon's large salary, they were over-budget and the producer just kept telling the director; "Listen, we can't afford to actually smash up all of those cars, so just keep shaking the camera and we'll make really fast, choppy edits so they won't be able to see the differance."
Take a Dramamine before viewing. And somehow I couldn't shake the feeling that, in real life, Damon can't actually fight like that.
Since you asked, 2:
Isn’t it a great feeling when you’re done with Christmas shopping? It reminds me of feeling like those smug kids in high school when you asked them; “Isn’t this term paper brutal? I’ll never finish on time.” And they reply; “Oh, I finished it a week ago. My Dad’s secretary typed it up yesterday.”
Because before you are finished shopping, all you do is run into people who say; “Oh, I did everything online last January.” And, “That’s why I hired a personal shopper. They cost more, but they’re worth it.” And then the worst: “Oh, we decided not to do presents this year and donate the money to charity instead.” Don’t you just hate those people with the red-hot hatred of one thousand suns? I sure do. Merry Christmas, Slats and Nuggies.
Merry, merry
A study in the “Journal of American Medical Association” reveals that terminally ill patients do not try and hang on through the Holidays. And if that cheery little story doesn’t get you in the Christmas spirit, nothing will.
Old habits die hard
I’m a sentimental guy during the Holidays, I like to stick with tradition and do the same things each year. For example, it just doesn’t feel like time to shop for presents until the clerk at the Seven Eleven yells: “Would you buy something? I have to close and go home for Christmas.”
Not the same
You know what gets me in the mood for Christmas? Christmas movies. But I have to admit, the one I rented was different then what I expected. Don’t confuse “Miracle on 34th street” with the more adult-rated “$100 Miracle on 42nd Street.”
And don’t confuse the classic “A Christmas Carol” with the Hustler video store version; “A Christmas Carol, Tiffany, Amber and Brandi.”
One bad actor
At the Robert Blake trial, a doctor testified he thought Robert Blake was insincere when he called out that his wife was shot. How bad of an actor are you when you can’t act like your wife is shot after you just shot her?
Imagine that?
In response to Shaquille O’Neal saying he was a brick wall and Kobe Bryant was a Corvette, Kobe replied that now that he is 230 pounds, he’s a combination Corvette and Hummer. After saying the word Hummer, Kobe then had an uncontrollable urge to order room service.
Since you asked:
Rented "Bourne Supremacy" last night. Just OK. One kept getting the feeling, due to Matt Damon's large salary, they were over-budget and the producer just kept telling the director; "Listen, we can't afford to actually smash up all of those cars, so just keep shaking the camera and we'll make really fast, choppy edits so they won't be able to see the differance."
Take a Dramamine before viewing. And somehow I couldn't shake the feeling that, in real life, Damon can't actually fight like that.
Since you asked, 2:
Isn’t it a great feeling when you’re done with Christmas shopping? It reminds me of feeling like those smug kids in high school when you asked them; “Isn’t this term paper brutal? I’ll never finish on time.” And they reply; “Oh, I finished it a week ago. My Dad’s secretary typed it up yesterday.”
Because before you are finished shopping, all you do is run into people who say; “Oh, I did everything online last January.” And, “That’s why I hired a personal shopper. They cost more, but they’re worth it.” And then the worst: “Oh, we decided not to do presents this year and donate the money to charity instead.” Don’t you just hate those people with the red-hot hatred of one thousand suns? I sure do. Merry Christmas, Slats and Nuggies.
posted by Alex at
10:44 AM
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