Monday, June 19, 2017

Has anyone seen this two, Iggy and Kesha together at the same time? And is it just me, or does Iggy look like she could be playing the banjo on a porch? 

Carrie Fisher’s autopsy reveals cocaine, heroin and ecstasy. The only way she could have more drugs in her system is if she had been on a date with Bill Cosby. 

 Or as Charlie Sheen calls cocaine, heroin and ecstasy: brunch.

Olympic swimmer, Michael Phelps, is going to race a shark during “Shark Week.” At the same time, Ryan Lochte is going to lie about being robbed by a shark. 

Donald Trump complained that Camp David was “rustic.” Remember, rustic for Trump is a gold-plated toilet instead of solid gold.

Tiger Woods spent father’s day with his two children, Sam and Charlie. After dropping them off, Tiger spent the rest of the day with his adopted kids, Xanax and Vicodin. 

New England Patriot, Rob Gronkowski, was shirtless in a Connecticut casino and rang up a $100,000 bar tab. Gronk became the first guy to ever enjoy losing their shirt in a casino. 

At the Golden State Warriors victory parade, coach Steve Kerr forgot to mention star, Steph Curry. That is when you know a team is stocked. When the anyone in “Did I forget anyone?” is the second best player in the league.

It was revealed, at the time of death, Carrie Fisher had cocaine, codeine and morphine in her system. That is not a toxicology report, that is a recipe for a Star Wars wrap party.