Tuesday, June 13, 2017

A number of juvenile great white sharks have been spotted in the ocean off San Diego. But do not worry, juvenile sharks never look up from their phones long enough to do any harm.

Last year, Kevin Durant was with the Oklahoma Thunder, this year he won the MVP for the Golden State Warriors. In Kevin’s case, MVP stands for Moving Very Promptly. 

Demi Moore revealed she is missing her two front teeth. When she starred with Tom Cruise in “A Few Good Men,” Cruise kept yelling, “You can’t handle the tooth.” 

The Nadi X yoga pants vibrate when your pose is incorrect. Which explains the new yoga pose: downward bad dog.

Sam Panopoulos, the man who invented the Hawaiian pizza, pineapple and ham, passed away at 83. Panopoulos is a Greek word that means “Nothing can mess up pizza.”

Donald Trump’s friend, Christopher Ruddy, started to say Donald Trump is considering firing Robert Mueller as special counsel. Ruddy did not get to finish talking because Trump fired him as a friend. 

The Golden State Warriors beat the Cleveland Cavaliers to win the NBA title. It was sweet when Kevin Durant, who left Oklahoma for the Warriors, brought his mother on the court. But it got awkward when Kevin’s mother left Kevin and decided to start cheering for Steph Curry.

Did you see the expressions on Melania and Barron Trump’s faces when they walked on the White House lawn? They looked like they found out “The Mummy” was playing in the White House theater.

Ivanka Trump said she was not prepared for the level of viciousness aimed at her father. And that is just from Melania about moving into the White House.

New York Yankee, Aaron Judge, just hit a home run 496 feet, the farthest since ESPN has been keeping track. That ball traveled farther than Tiger Woods on Xanax. 

“The Mummy,” is a box office disaster. The only people who went to see “The Mummy,” were the people who thought it was a documentary about Wonder Woman’s mother.

After the Pittsburgh Penguins won the Stanley Cup, a Nashville Predator fan swore at NBC announcer, Mike Milbury. Milbury looked mad. Even his scowl had a scowl. 

Since you asked:

“Strunk and White, The Element of Style.”

“It’s as timeless as a book can be in our age of volubility.” — “The New York Times”

Chapter 5: An Approach To Style (With a list of reminders)

#14. Avoid fancy words.