Saturday, November 14, 2015

Track and Field’s governing body has suspended the entire Russian team for state-sponsored doping. Vladimir Putin was furious and flew into a rage, but then later said; “Sorry, that is the steroids talking.” 

Vladimir Putin was so furious he tried to rip his shirt off, but he wasn’t wearing one.

New York Giants, Jason Pierre-Paul, who blew up his right hand in a fireworks accident, predicted he will sack New England Patriot QB, Tom Brady, Sunday. When asked the reason why he thought he would sack Brady, Jason could not put his finger on it. 

Thoughts on Paris:

On the bright side of a dark time, we Americans have not felt this close to Parisians since we discovered they consider Jerry Lewis a comedic god. 

Though I have not read the whole thing, in "The Art of War," Sun Tzu cannot stress enough the need to know your enemy. In my mind, it may not be possible to know the mind of an enemy who hates and murders people enjoying a Fall Friday evening in Paris.

Tonight's debate drinking game is to chug whenever a candidate reminds us poor idiots, who have probably forgotten, that not all Muslims are terrorists. You will get drunker than Ben Affleck between rehabs.