Am I going crazy or is this dog cranking a gnarly left switchback?

Getting your getting on on, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers


Child obesity is bad. KFC now stands for Kids Fat as Cattle.

The makers of the feminine hygiene product, Mooncup, have signed Amy Winehouse as their celebrity spokesperson. Because, if you’re like me, when you think Amy Winehouse, you think: “That woman has one spiffy-clean cooter.”

April is Sexually Transmitted Disease month, primarily because so many people get screwed by the IRS.

Reports say the Taliban is in financial trouble. To give you an idea how bad it is, the Taliban is charging men to use their camels. And they are charging to let them ride the camels as well.

A 42-year-old Portland man set the high scoring record for Asteroids by playing for 58 straight hours. Here’s the best part, gals: he’s single.

A report shows Sarah Palin earned at least $12 mil in speaking and appearance fees, more than 100 times what she was making as Gov. of Alaska. In fact, Sarah Palin is so rich, she can now see Russia from her mansion.

In Tennessee, a man was charged with a DUI while driving a lawnmower and stealing fishing poles. For the love of decency, Andy Dick, get some help.

Trouble at the Chicago White Sox home opener, a couple was discovered having sex in a men’s room stall. This is the last time they ask ex-Idaho Senator Larry Craig to throw out the first pitch.

Former action star, Steven Seagal, has been sued for sexual assault by a former employee. If these charges are true then, at the least, Seagal acted inappropriately. On the bright side, this would be the first time the words acted and Steven Seagal ever appeared together.

Pittsburgh QB, Ben Roethlisberger lost a deal with a beef jerky company after his second sexual assault charge was dropped. The good news? Ben & Jerry is going to name an ice cream flavor after Roethlisberger: Steeler Squealer.

The Library of Congress is going to enter all Twitter entries since 2006. Who could have ever imagined the Library of Congress will have a tending topic titled: “Your Momma’s who-ha.”


Since you asked:
One of my cherished and beloved many of several dozens regular aLbB readers suggested, well, implied, oh, all right, flat out told me I was too rough on the poor Tiger Woods. God forbid the senseless and meaningless ramblings of an over-caffeinated knucklehead alleged comedy writer get in the hands of a legendary billionaire and hurt his feelings.


They pointed out, OK, shoved in my face, the fact that there are many factors to consider that could speak in Tiger’s behalf. The pressure to win and maintain a high profile image, his wife’s possibly difficult and reportedly high maintenance demanding personality. On and on.

Well, Slats and Nuggliesesses, you tell me? Tiger Woods reformed Buddhist unfairly judged due to the harsh media glare? Or fugtard douche-bag asshat manwhore dorkbucket?
Let me know:


lexkase@san.rr.com