Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Who would have guessed the monkey on Conan's back would end up being NBC?


And now, heerree’s Johnny, no, Jay, no, Dave, no, Jay, no, Conan, no, Jay, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

Or as they call it
Subway passengers around the world observed “No Pants Subway Ride” on Sunday; or as New York subway riders call it: Sunday.

Trying again
A brothel in Nevada will offer men for women. It’s called the Shady Lady. Which is better than their first name: Bed, Bath and Beyond Five Inches.

Which one?
The cover of “Entertainment Weekly” features “American Idol” judges Simon Cowell and Ellen DeGeneres. One of them really looks like a lesbian, the other one is Ellen DeGeneres.

What’s in a name?
The first quarter of the New England Patriots-Baltimore Ravens game was exciting, lots of scoring. Too bad the Patriots didn’t see it. Now I know why they are called the Pats. There is no riot in that team.

Who knew?
I saw the most amazing thing during a commercial in the NFL playoff games. Did you know that 15 minutes with Geico could save you 15% on your car insurance? Why don’t they tell people about this?

Like that
The Arizona Cardinals out-dueled the Green Bay Packers, 51-45 in the NFC Wild Card game; the Packers Cardinal game ending with a defensive score is like a U2 concert ending with an accordion solo.

That’s nice
Things haven’t been all gloomy around they Jay Leno Show, he received some nice cards from Tiger Woods, Harry Reid and Rod Blagojevich thanking him for keeping them out of the news.

Or like that
The Arizona Cardinals out-dueled the Green Bay Packers, 51-45 in the NFC Wild Card game; this Packers-Cardinal game ending with a defensive score is like a Paris Hilton sex video ending with a poetry recital.

D-less defense
Amn it all, those gosh arn Carinals outlaste the Packers, 51-45 in the Wil Car game on Sunay: (No D at all)

Too much by a lot
Senate Majority Leader, Harry Reid, described President Obama as light-skinned with no negro dialect unless he wants to have one. I think Reid overdid his apology: “Yo, yo, check it, for realsies, Imma gonna say I’s for sorrizzy for realizzy.”

Not even
And impeached Ill. Gov. Rod Blagojevich says he is blacker than Barack Obama; is he insane? Blagojevich isn’t even blacker than Sammy Sosa

Since you asked:

Apparently Conan may have gotten out flanked by the NBC lawyers. It looks like they gave him "The Tonight Show" without including the 11:35
time slot. Otherwise they would be in breach of contract moving it to 12:05 and owe Conan around $45 million.

Conan's letter was classy but pissed off, thus making it refreshingly honest. And wow does Coco have public sympathy. Not sure why many of that public is dumping on Jay Leno as well. Leno is also getting royally tooled by NBC.

Conan's letter specifies he is not accepting thrashing the reputation of the "The Tonight Show" by moving it to 12:05, which, among other problems, is not technically tonight. Whether or not NBC's decision to compromise the history and quality of "The Tonight Show" by moving it to the next day represents a breach of contract would have to be settled between Conan and NBC and eventually the courts. I can't imagine NBC being so short-sighted that they would intentionally damage the brand name of their biggest icon, "The Tonight Show."

But then I never thought they would be so short-sighted as to can "The Jay Leno Show" while it was a still carving out its proper place.

As Letterman said with tongue firmly in cheek:

"Remember, those NBC executives wouldn't be there if they didn't know what they were doing."