Just Screw It

Just do it to it and screw it, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers


Everyone is making out their Christmas lists. Tiger Woods is asking for a brand new alibi.


Luxury Swiss watchmaker Tag Heuer is sticking with Tiger Woods. Not only that, they are going to make a new Tiger Woods watch. Instead of a big hand and a little hand, the Tiger watch has a big head and a little head, but only the little head functions.


It’s the time of year when Santa Claus decides who’s been naughty or nice. Gosh, I wonder which way that is going to go for Tiger Woods?


Have you heard about the new Tiger Woods Christmas Special? It’s called; “Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.

Here is a fun bit we at a.L.B.B. like to call:

End of conversations you don’t want to walk in on at a party:

“ . . . and if I catch who taught the little bastard to call Child Protective Services, I’ll kill ‘em.”


“ . . . I can’t tell if it’s just irritated or infected. Can I show you?”


“ . . . now I have to go to everyone in the neighborhood and tell them. Can you believe that?”


“ . . . so I said, if you ain’t got a restraining order, it ain’t stalking, sugar lips.”


“ . . . sure, they call it embezzling, I call it creative investing.”


“ . . . they just let me out for the funerals, I have to go back in on Monday.” (I actually heard that one)

“ . . . I could have sworn that gun wasn’t loaded.”

" . . . how something that huge fit in me, I have no idea."

" . . . I like her, and she is Tiger Woods approved."