Hate the game, not the playa, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers


Tiger Woods’s neighbors report, after his crash, seeing Tiger prone, shoeless and snoring. And they claim alcohol wasn’t involved? Yeah, right, like icebergs had nothing to do with the Titanic.


There is a play in New York called “The Gayest Christmas Pageant Ever” How gay is it? Adam Lambert saw it and now he is against gay marriage.


The Daily Beast reports Tiger Woods and his wife Elin are undergoing counseling. You know what this means? Tiger will soon be entering sex addiction rehabilitation. Good luck with the anonymous part of sexaholics anonymous: “Hello, my name’s Tiger.”


Rumor has it Brad and Angelina’s marriage is in trouble. It’s serious, apparently he is team Jacob, and she it team Edward.


Tiger Woods’s wife, Elin Nordegren, has reportedly been offered $60 million if she’ll stay married to Tiger for two more years. Let me tell you something, guys, if you can’t get a woman to stay married to you for two years for $60 mil? Three words: You breath stink.


Apparently Tiger Woods’s wife, Elin, is still furious, proving that old adage, hell hath no fury like a woman with a 60 degree lob wedge.

(Apologies to “The Simpsons”)
Upon hearing that Tiger Woods was hit with a sand wedge, an open faced club, a confused President George W. Bush said, “How much could an open faced club sandwich hurt?”


So far Tiger Woods’s sponsors are staying with him, but that could change. For example, Tiger could lose American Express but pick up Trojan condoms. The mottos are the same; “Don’t leave home without it.”


Apparently Tiger Woods got quite a beating from his wife, Elin. It was the most pain Tiger has been in since he got drunk and fell off the ball washer.


PETA has asked the University of Georgia to replace their bulldog mascot, Uga, with a robot; thank goodness, for a while there I was starting to worry PETA seemed like a bunch of nut jobs with way too much time on their hands.


There is a play in New York called “The Gayest Christmas Pageant Ever.” To which the offended producers of “Mamma Mia” said; “Oh yeah? Bring it, bitches.”