What it is, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

The Rock and Roll Marathon in San Diego was swept by three Kenyans; in other shocking sports news, a golfer gave another golfer a very clumsy and awkward high five.

The NBA has announced they will give fines for flopping and they’re serious, today they fined every single professional soccer player $50,000.

Maxim reported New York Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter has dated six women on the magazine's "Hot 100 of 2008" list. Sure, six out of a hundred doesn’t sound impressive in baseball terms, but he reached home every time.

Sharon Stone is in trouble for saying China’s earthquake was due to bad karma from mistreating Tibet; this brilliant political and spiritual insight is brought to you by an actress most famous for flashing her vajay-jay.

The Los Angeles Lakers beat the San Antonio Spurs and are going to the NBA finals; the most amazing shot was Kobe’s fade-away jumper over Spurs center Tim Duncan to make it 89-82. It was the most amazing shot since Clay Aiken impregnated his 50-year-old producer.


The Los Angeles Lakers will face the Boston Celtics for the NBA Championship. The good news is this will bring back footage of the Larry Bird/Magic Johnson championships in the eighties. The bad news is this will bring back footage of Larry
Bird in his Daisy Duke tight green shorts.