Can I get a righteous hey nah nanny and a ha cha cha one time, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers?
Do me running and call me Betty, Slatticises and Nugglieosities.
My word, I just got worked, worked again, worked some more, worked a tad more and then got a hot steaming bowl of worked soup poured onto my big dumb head with a side of worked.
Went to Cardiff Reef and it was pumping pretty good. Should I or shouldn’t I? Dale would go*. Why not? Now, in retrospect, my first clue should have been that there were no other stand up bros but one and he was awesome. No problem, I will take the safe way out and paddle out on my stomach with the blade under my chest and handle forward.
Bit wave breaks, the white wash knocks me back. Keep paddling, it happens again. This time a bigger wave breaks and knocks me spinning. OK, this is harder than I thought it would be. Let’s try it on the knees where I can use the paddle. Knocked off and back. Now I am getting a little pissed and frustrated. Try the knees again. Knocked back but not off. Paddle hard. Whew, finally making progress. Big roller, no problem. Up and down without getting knocked off. Now I am ready to stand up. I hear a loud roaring noise. I look up and a huge wave out of nowhere crashes on my head.
Before I know what is happening I am a rag doll in the rinse cycle under water. My big-ass board hits me, I lose the paddle. Life is becoming very real very fast. I try to catch my breath, another wave whomps on top of me sending me under water again. Another wave munches me. In rapid succession, I worry about losing my paddle, then I worry about losing the board if the leash snaps like it did two weeks ago. Now I am washed back to where I can stand up. Another wave whomps me, I suck in some salt water and pop up coughing out water. Now I am worried about losing a lot more.
Time to bail. I sit on the board and ride in some white wash, stand up and carry it on the beach. All at once, I am exhausted, frustrated, dizzy, addle-minded, embarrassed and ashamed.
Did I quit? Oh hell no. I retreated a bit. Drove South to La Jolla Shores, saw it was a much friendlier, but still very powerful, break and headed out without any problems. Rode some good waves and had a blast. Washed that bad taste of defeat right out of my mouth.
If you ever need a quick lesson in hubris, take up a sport in the ocean. Just as soon as you start to think you might begin to kind of feel a little cocky, it will knock you right back into a state of serious respectfulness.
My knee is scraped and banged up with a big bruise, my hands are raw, my thumb hit the paddle and I thought I broke it, my neck has a crick in it that makes me walk like the hunchback of Notre Dame and I have a ton of salt water in my head up my nose and every muscle is spent.
And I couldn’t be happier.
Sung to the tune of Van Morrison’s “Baby Please Don’t Go.”
Got a big-ass board
Got a big-ass board
Got a big-ass board
Rode a wave up there
You know I love it so
Baby, Dale would go*
*Dale Webster has surfed a world record 10,470 consecutive days surfing for 28 years.
Let me look into the future: Yep, some Maggies and Sliders are in this here Gaucho’s future.
Do me running and call me Betty, Slatticises and Nugglieosities.
My word, I just got worked, worked again, worked some more, worked a tad more and then got a hot steaming bowl of worked soup poured onto my big dumb head with a side of worked.
Went to Cardiff Reef and it was pumping pretty good. Should I or shouldn’t I? Dale would go*. Why not? Now, in retrospect, my first clue should have been that there were no other stand up bros but one and he was awesome. No problem, I will take the safe way out and paddle out on my stomach with the blade under my chest and handle forward.
Bit wave breaks, the white wash knocks me back. Keep paddling, it happens again. This time a bigger wave breaks and knocks me spinning. OK, this is harder than I thought it would be. Let’s try it on the knees where I can use the paddle. Knocked off and back. Now I am getting a little pissed and frustrated. Try the knees again. Knocked back but not off. Paddle hard. Whew, finally making progress. Big roller, no problem. Up and down without getting knocked off. Now I am ready to stand up. I hear a loud roaring noise. I look up and a huge wave out of nowhere crashes on my head.
Before I know what is happening I am a rag doll in the rinse cycle under water. My big-ass board hits me, I lose the paddle. Life is becoming very real very fast. I try to catch my breath, another wave whomps on top of me sending me under water again. Another wave munches me. In rapid succession, I worry about losing my paddle, then I worry about losing the board if the leash snaps like it did two weeks ago. Now I am washed back to where I can stand up. Another wave whomps me, I suck in some salt water and pop up coughing out water. Now I am worried about losing a lot more.
Time to bail. I sit on the board and ride in some white wash, stand up and carry it on the beach. All at once, I am exhausted, frustrated, dizzy, addle-minded, embarrassed and ashamed.
Did I quit? Oh hell no. I retreated a bit. Drove South to La Jolla Shores, saw it was a much friendlier, but still very powerful, break and headed out without any problems. Rode some good waves and had a blast. Washed that bad taste of defeat right out of my mouth.
If you ever need a quick lesson in hubris, take up a sport in the ocean. Just as soon as you start to think you might begin to kind of feel a little cocky, it will knock you right back into a state of serious respectfulness.
My knee is scraped and banged up with a big bruise, my hands are raw, my thumb hit the paddle and I thought I broke it, my neck has a crick in it that makes me walk like the hunchback of Notre Dame and I have a ton of salt water in my head up my nose and every muscle is spent.
And I couldn’t be happier.
Sung to the tune of Van Morrison’s “Baby Please Don’t Go.”
Got a big-ass board
Got a big-ass board
Got a big-ass board
Rode a wave up there
You know I love it so
Baby, Dale would go*
*Dale Webster has surfed a world record 10,470 consecutive days surfing for 28 years.
Let me look into the future: Yep, some Maggies and Sliders are in this here Gaucho’s future.
posted by Alex at
2:06 PM
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