Rag tagged and jet lagged, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers
Boom and suddenly you’re a vicious gossip
The military admitted they were investigating using a gay bomb; a chemical weapon that would induce enemy male soldiers to have sex with each other rather than fight. Don’t we already have a chemical weapon that will induce men to have sex with each other? It’s called an Appletini.
Bad boys, bad boys, whatchya gonna do?
Golfer John Daly claims his wife attacked him in his sleep with a steak knife but his wife says Daly sexually assaulted her when he was drunk. Add a wildly barking dog, Daly with no shirt and we got us an episode of “Cops.”
Ewww
The North American Nude Bikers club held its first cycling rally last weekend. I think it was called the Tour De Throw That Bike Seat Away.”
Makes sense
Los Angeles Laker Kobe Bryant is upset about being labeled a petulant brat despite his recent on-and-off trade demands and belittling his teammates and owner in the press. In fact, Kobe is so upset at the label petulant brat, if it doesn’t stop, Kobe is going to hold his breath until he is blue.
Hate to see that
Atlanta QB Michael Vick is being investigated for hosting illegal and horribly cruel dog fighting gambling. Even if not charged, many feel Vick’s reputation is so ruined by this scandal he will have no choice but to leave pro football completely and play for the Oakland Raiders.
So that is what that sound is
Five-time Wimbledon champ Bjorn Borg pulled out of a match because of a dog bite. Borg was hurt trying to stop a dog fight at his home in Sweden when his Golden Retriever was attacked by a German Shepherd. Somewhere Michael Vick’s laughter just dissolved into quiet sobs.
Editor’s note:
There are a lot of things athletes can do wrong that fans will forgive: taking drugs, domestic abuse, cheating on their wives, gambling, tax evasion, even drunk driving. In a country that gladly spent $40 billion last year on their pets, Americans cannot forgive cruelty to animals.
Boom and suddenly you’re a vicious gossip
The military admitted they were investigating using a gay bomb; a chemical weapon that would induce enemy male soldiers to have sex with each other rather than fight. Don’t we already have a chemical weapon that will induce men to have sex with each other? It’s called an Appletini.
Bad boys, bad boys, whatchya gonna do?
Golfer John Daly claims his wife attacked him in his sleep with a steak knife but his wife says Daly sexually assaulted her when he was drunk. Add a wildly barking dog, Daly with no shirt and we got us an episode of “Cops.”
Ewww
The North American Nude Bikers club held its first cycling rally last weekend. I think it was called the Tour De Throw That Bike Seat Away.”
Makes sense
Los Angeles Laker Kobe Bryant is upset about being labeled a petulant brat despite his recent on-and-off trade demands and belittling his teammates and owner in the press. In fact, Kobe is so upset at the label petulant brat, if it doesn’t stop, Kobe is going to hold his breath until he is blue.
Hate to see that
Atlanta QB Michael Vick is being investigated for hosting illegal and horribly cruel dog fighting gambling. Even if not charged, many feel Vick’s reputation is so ruined by this scandal he will have no choice but to leave pro football completely and play for the Oakland Raiders.
So that is what that sound is
Five-time Wimbledon champ Bjorn Borg pulled out of a match because of a dog bite. Borg was hurt trying to stop a dog fight at his home in Sweden when his Golden Retriever was attacked by a German Shepherd. Somewhere Michael Vick’s laughter just dissolved into quiet sobs.
Editor’s note:
There are a lot of things athletes can do wrong that fans will forgive: taking drugs, domestic abuse, cheating on their wives, gambling, tax evasion, even drunk driving. In a country that gladly spent $40 billion last year on their pets, Americans cannot forgive cruelty to animals.
posted by Alex at
3:46 PM
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