It is hard out here

We got the merry Chrisizzy up in this humpty bumpy, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

Brrrrrrrrrrrr
Man it is cold. This morning I was shaking like Rosie O’Donnell’s publicist.

Christmas time
Paris Hilton, Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan are still running around together right up to Christmas. Or as we call Paris, Linday and Britney this time of year; Ho, Ho, Ho.

Oh sure, that’s it
A man who resembles Santa Claus was kicked out of Disney World because officials felt he was confusing children. Oh, but a huge talking dog wearing a giant hat named Goofy, that doesn’t confuse kids at all. Nope, that’s fine.

What are the odds?
“The Views” Rosie O’Donnell is involved in another ugly celebrity feud, this time with Donald Trump. First Rosie insulted Kelly Ripa, then the entire country of China and now Trump. Wouldn’t be funny if it turns out Star Jones is the nice host from “The View”?

Christmas cheer
Today is that very special time of year when you give that certain someone a present that says; “Dear Boss, Sorry I called you a bonehead, it was the egg nog talking.”

Today is that special day when you give somebody a card that says; “Could you please give me all the photo copies of my naked butt from the company party?”

Which one do you go with?
“The Views” Rosie O’Donnell is in an ugly fight with Donald Trump. Boy, who do you cheer for in this one? On the one hand you have a dude who is really pompous blow-hard egomaniac with bad hair, and then you also have Donald Trump.

“The Views” Rosie O’Donnell is in an ugly fight with Donald Trump. Come on you two, it’s Christmas, kiss and make up. On second thought, nobody wants to see that.

It worked before
Once again, Rocky is #1 at the box office. Apparently America can’t get enough of dim-witted guys who are hard to understand. Hey, it got President Bush re-elected.

Disney too
A man who looks like Santa Claus, was kicked out of Disney World. Disney felt that the man created a conflict by pretending to be a mythical character. And if there is one thing Disney won’t tolerate, it is promoting mythical characters to kids.

Long night
Thursday was the longest night of the year. Especially if you saw “Deck the Halls.”

Yo, what's-your-name
Once again, Rocky is #1 at the box office. The first Rocky came out in 1976 but things were a lot different then. The Middle East was in turmoil, the Rolling Stones were on tour and Jack Nicholson was sleeping around with a lot of hot women.

“The Views” Rosie O’Donnell is in an ugly fight with Donald Trump. Just yesterday Donald Trump called Rosie a bully, a liar and a loser. And today, Rosie shot back: she ate Donald Trump.