It is hard out here
Trow yo hands in da air and give me a fo shizzy fo rizzy, my bizzy, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers
Hit quite a snag
Kevin Federline has been approached to write a tell-all book about Britney Spears; although interested in the idea, the deal hit a snag when K-Fed asked; “OK, so what’s a book, yo?”
Desperate times
In Florida, somebody stole Christmas toys donated to give to children with cancer. Man, I know his book deal fell through, but that O.J. Simpson must be really broke.
Well, she did
Now that his potential presidential candidacy is gaining strength people are interested in Illinois Senator Barack Obama’s name. Did you know that Obama’s middle name is Hussein? At least that’s what Hillary Clinton is telling everyone.
Not good
Now that his potential presidential candidacy is gaining strength, people are interested in Illinois Senator Barack Obama’s name. Did you know that Obama’s middle name is Hussein? That couldn’t be worse news for the Barack’s campaign than if his middle name was John Kerry.
What I mean is they can handle it
A Fort Collins, CO 29-year-old blonde teacher is charged with sexual assault of her 17-year-old male student. Is it actually possible for an attractive woman to sexually assault a 17-year-old boy? That’s like throwing donuts at Rueben Stoddard.
Can a hot 29-year-old blonde woman really sexually assault a healthy 17-year-old boy? Now if the guy was 90-years-old, than yes, that would be assault with intent to kill. A 17-year-old can take anything she can dish out.
Get it?
Kevin Federline wants to give Britney Spears a nice Christmas stocking. But, luckily for Britney, her restraining order refrains Kevin from stalking Britney’s Christmas.
About the same level of interest
Ohio Dem. congressman Dennis Kucinich announced he is running for President in 2008; in equally important news, today my dog, Wrigley, snored when he took a nap.
Ohio congressman Dennis Kucinich announced he is running for President in 2008; this would be really great news if not for the fact that absolutely nobody gives a damn.
Ohio congressman Dennis Kucinich polled his followers and they said Kucinich should run for President in 2008. But only if Kucinich promised to stop pestering them and let the three of them finish their Happy Meals in peace.
Poor guy
What is with the rash of celebrity D.U.I’s? Yesterday, Nicole Richey, before her Rip Torn, Paris Hilton, Mel Gibson. And today, Kramer, Michael Richards, was pulled over for drunk driving. But they let him go because, since his racist tirade, Michael can’t get arrested as a celebrity.
The gift that says “You’re an idiot”
A poll reveals that 50% of people will give a gift card this year. And what says Christmas more than a card that says; “I thought you would blow this money on something crappy so I got you credit at a decent store.”
What does this mean?
The September 11th Nicolas Cage movie “World Trade Center” is out on DVD; my wife wants to see that but I told her I don’t know if I can take seeing all that carnage. Then she said; “OK, how about “Brokeback Mountain” and I said, “So, Nicolas Cage, huh? He’s good.”
Since you asked:
Just saw my DVR’d “30 Rock” and it is official. I have a crazy crush on Tina Fey. No lie, I am going to find out where her English class is and sprint over there just to walk by when she gets out and see if she says hello to me. And I am going to suddenly be real friendly with that band guy I haven’t ever given the time of day to because I know he lives next to her.
Tina Fey is smolderingly hot (yes, I know Tina would know that is redundant) cute, witty and sexy, but she is also brilliantly self-deprecating. Who knows what she is really like in person? But I get the feeling from seeing her on Conan and Dave that she is actually like her character.
Check out “30 Rock” it is by far the funniest show of all the shows about “Saturday Night Live.” (Tina said “30 Rock” is to “Studio 60” what “Hogan’s Heroes” is to “Schindler’s List”)
Tina’s Liz Lemon’s single bar fiasco night capped by her drunken, soulful and yet bitter Karaoke rendition of Janis Ian’s “At Seventeen” on the last show was priceless.
Hit quite a snag
Kevin Federline has been approached to write a tell-all book about Britney Spears; although interested in the idea, the deal hit a snag when K-Fed asked; “OK, so what’s a book, yo?”
Desperate times
In Florida, somebody stole Christmas toys donated to give to children with cancer. Man, I know his book deal fell through, but that O.J. Simpson must be really broke.
Well, she did
Now that his potential presidential candidacy is gaining strength people are interested in Illinois Senator Barack Obama’s name. Did you know that Obama’s middle name is Hussein? At least that’s what Hillary Clinton is telling everyone.
Not good
Now that his potential presidential candidacy is gaining strength, people are interested in Illinois Senator Barack Obama’s name. Did you know that Obama’s middle name is Hussein? That couldn’t be worse news for the Barack’s campaign than if his middle name was John Kerry.
What I mean is they can handle it
A Fort Collins, CO 29-year-old blonde teacher is charged with sexual assault of her 17-year-old male student. Is it actually possible for an attractive woman to sexually assault a 17-year-old boy? That’s like throwing donuts at Rueben Stoddard.
Can a hot 29-year-old blonde woman really sexually assault a healthy 17-year-old boy? Now if the guy was 90-years-old, than yes, that would be assault with intent to kill. A 17-year-old can take anything she can dish out.
Get it?
Kevin Federline wants to give Britney Spears a nice Christmas stocking. But, luckily for Britney, her restraining order refrains Kevin from stalking Britney’s Christmas.
About the same level of interest
Ohio Dem. congressman Dennis Kucinich announced he is running for President in 2008; in equally important news, today my dog, Wrigley, snored when he took a nap.
Ohio congressman Dennis Kucinich announced he is running for President in 2008; this would be really great news if not for the fact that absolutely nobody gives a damn.
Ohio congressman Dennis Kucinich polled his followers and they said Kucinich should run for President in 2008. But only if Kucinich promised to stop pestering them and let the three of them finish their Happy Meals in peace.
Poor guy
What is with the rash of celebrity D.U.I’s? Yesterday, Nicole Richey, before her Rip Torn, Paris Hilton, Mel Gibson. And today, Kramer, Michael Richards, was pulled over for drunk driving. But they let him go because, since his racist tirade, Michael can’t get arrested as a celebrity.
The gift that says “You’re an idiot”
A poll reveals that 50% of people will give a gift card this year. And what says Christmas more than a card that says; “I thought you would blow this money on something crappy so I got you credit at a decent store.”
What does this mean?
The September 11th Nicolas Cage movie “World Trade Center” is out on DVD; my wife wants to see that but I told her I don’t know if I can take seeing all that carnage. Then she said; “OK, how about “Brokeback Mountain” and I said, “So, Nicolas Cage, huh? He’s good.”
Since you asked:
Just saw my DVR’d “30 Rock” and it is official. I have a crazy crush on Tina Fey. No lie, I am going to find out where her English class is and sprint over there just to walk by when she gets out and see if she says hello to me. And I am going to suddenly be real friendly with that band guy I haven’t ever given the time of day to because I know he lives next to her.
Tina Fey is smolderingly hot (yes, I know Tina would know that is redundant) cute, witty and sexy, but she is also brilliantly self-deprecating. Who knows what she is really like in person? But I get the feeling from seeing her on Conan and Dave that she is actually like her character.
Check out “30 Rock” it is by far the funniest show of all the shows about “Saturday Night Live.” (Tina said “30 Rock” is to “Studio 60” what “Hogan’s Heroes” is to “Schindler’s List”)
Tina’s Liz Lemon’s single bar fiasco night capped by her drunken, soulful and yet bitter Karaoke rendition of Janis Ian’s “At Seventeen” on the last show was priceless.
posted by Alex at
1:13 PM
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