We got crazizzle skillizzle up in here Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers
Good news
*Did you have a good mother's day? It was pretty good. At least from what I heard, nobody's Mom's house got hit by Billy Joel.
You had to see it
*Did you see the picture in the paper of Phil Specter at his trial? When did he turn into Beatlejuice?
Good news, bad news
Despite rumors, Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt's marriage is doing fine. That's good news if you are their fans, bad news if you are an idiot that thought you stood a shot.
Where is the market?
*An entrepreneur has come out with a scale that goes to 1000 pounds. Who is going to buy this? Everyone who weighs 1,000 pounds can't get out of bed until they tear the wall down and hoist them out with a crane.
Shiite head
*Insurgent Shiite cleric Moktada al Sadr denounced the mis-treatment of Iraqi prisoners by U.S. solders. As a result of the prisoner humiliation, al Sadr said they will have to blow up even more innocent people.
Low carbs
*In California a woman goes into a Costco and buys a hot dog. She bites into it and there’s a live bullet. It's OK, though, bullets are low-in-carbs and Atkins-diet approved.
If I had to guess
*Congratulations to Martie MaGuire of the Dixie Chicks she just gave birth to twins. I'm not sure what she named her kids, but I think we can rule out George, Walker or Bush.
Catchy name
*You can tell the "Friends" gravy train has stopped. Today the band that did the theme song, the Rembrandts? Now they are billing themselves as the Rembrandts of house painting.
Starting to become clear
*In Athens, workers finally put the roof on the Olympic stadium less than 100 days before the Olympics. The workers reportedly celebrated by drinking wine. I think I am starting to understand why the Athens construction is running so far behind. "Hey, I put in a nail. Give me a drink."
Let's hope not
*Brad Pitt said that the success of "Troy" will have men wearing skirts inside a year. I can think of six words why that wouldn't happen: Picture Dr. Phil in a skirt.
Who is this guy?
Iraqi Shi'ite cleric Moqtada al-Sadr has ordered his Mehdi Army to launch a broad offensive against U.S.-led forces. Here's my question, who died and made this ugly fat loser Uday?
Al Sadr is the head of the Iraqi Shiite Muslims. As opposed to the Diicke or Priicke Muslims
Good news
*Did you have a good mother's day? It was pretty good. At least from what I heard, nobody's Mom's house got hit by Billy Joel.
You had to see it
*Did you see the picture in the paper of Phil Specter at his trial? When did he turn into Beatlejuice?
Good news, bad news
Despite rumors, Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt's marriage is doing fine. That's good news if you are their fans, bad news if you are an idiot that thought you stood a shot.
Where is the market?
*An entrepreneur has come out with a scale that goes to 1000 pounds. Who is going to buy this? Everyone who weighs 1,000 pounds can't get out of bed until they tear the wall down and hoist them out with a crane.
Shiite head
*Insurgent Shiite cleric Moktada al Sadr denounced the mis-treatment of Iraqi prisoners by U.S. solders. As a result of the prisoner humiliation, al Sadr said they will have to blow up even more innocent people.
Low carbs
*In California a woman goes into a Costco and buys a hot dog. She bites into it and there’s a live bullet. It's OK, though, bullets are low-in-carbs and Atkins-diet approved.
If I had to guess
*Congratulations to Martie MaGuire of the Dixie Chicks she just gave birth to twins. I'm not sure what she named her kids, but I think we can rule out George, Walker or Bush.
Catchy name
*You can tell the "Friends" gravy train has stopped. Today the band that did the theme song, the Rembrandts? Now they are billing themselves as the Rembrandts of house painting.
Starting to become clear
*In Athens, workers finally put the roof on the Olympic stadium less than 100 days before the Olympics. The workers reportedly celebrated by drinking wine. I think I am starting to understand why the Athens construction is running so far behind. "Hey, I put in a nail. Give me a drink."
Let's hope not
*Brad Pitt said that the success of "Troy" will have men wearing skirts inside a year. I can think of six words why that wouldn't happen: Picture Dr. Phil in a skirt.
Who is this guy?
Iraqi Shi'ite cleric Moqtada al-Sadr has ordered his Mehdi Army to launch a broad offensive against U.S.-led forces. Here's my question, who died and made this ugly fat loser Uday?
Al Sadr is the head of the Iraqi Shiite Muslims. As opposed to the Diicke or Priicke Muslims
posted by Alex at
2:01 PM
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