And another thing:
My favorite thing about my new toy,TiVo? Sure it's convenient and easy to use. But my favorite feature is it's ability to alter the space-time continuum. While watching a Cubs game, I can hit the pause and time stops. I am now watching a live game . . . in the past. Creepy, huh?

Just for fun, I wanted to see if I hit the forward button, if my TiVo can see into the future. Guess what? It can. What did I find in the future? Let's just say don't get your hopes up about the "Friends" spin-off "Joey."

Good news. After something like 17 years, U2's Bono finally found what he was looking for. Yeah, turns out it was in his sofa cushions the whole time.

Speaking of finding things, we need to make it illegal - instill some fine, or at least a free slap in the face - for anyone to say, when something is lost;

"It's always in the last place you look."

Of course it's the last place you look. If you found it, you don't need to look anymore now do you? Did somebody once say;

"Oh, here is my wallet. But just to be safe, I am going to look to see if it's also in this drawer. If it is, I can double my cash. Wow. What do you know, it's not in there. It's still in my hand."

What my wife likes to do when I lose something is Gaslight me. I ask her, "Have you seen my wallet?" There are only two answers: yes or no. If yes, then tell me where. If no, stop talking. Now.

My wife insists on listing every single solitary possible place it could be;

"Did you check your pants? How about your desk? Is it in your car?"

This I do not need. I am only too aware of all the differant possibilities of where my wallet might be, I just need to know, specifically, if she has seen it.

Short of losing a loved one, or a dire medical diagnosis, is there a worse feeling than when you suspect your wallet is seriously lost? Not the I-know-it's-in-the-house-somewhere lost, I mean the Did-I-leave-it-at-the-restaurant? lost. My mind immediately reels to invision some very unnatractive and unlikeable person buying extremely luxurious items with my money. (Not unlike the voice over credit card commercials)

Losing one's wallet does not bring out the best in a person. Everybody you've ever met in your life is now a shady suspect.

My wife especially.