Thursday, October 02, 2003

The blues ain't nothin' but a good Cubs fan feelin' bad, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

The Sperminator
Arnold Schwarzenegger outlined his first 100 days in office. You should see what he has planned for day 69.

It’s looking a little better for Gray Davis, today he got the support of a pretty sizeable voting block: women who have been groped by Arnold.

Six women have claimed to have been groped and sexually harassed by Arnold Schwarzenegger. For his part, Arnold apologized saying he meant it jokingly and he is genuinely sorry if he offended any of the women, including the hoochy mammas, nasty ho’s or even the skanks.

It turns out the name Schwarzenegger is German for; “Wanna see where the horse bit me?”

Six women claim that Arnold Schwarzenneger groped them, several specifically mentioned that Arnold grabbed their left breast. Arnold, this isn't what we meant when we wanted you to keep abreast of the issues.

Rush to judgment
Rush Limbaugh, after resigning his ESPN job for saying Quarterback Donovan McNabb is overrated because the media wants him to succeed because he is black, now Rush might face investigation, in Florida, of abusing prescription drugs. Limbaugh said the only reason press is reporting this story because he is white and they want him to do badly.

It was a rough day for Rush Limbaugh. First he resigned from ESPN for suspect comments and Florida is investigating Limbaugh for abusing prescription drugs. If all that wasn’t bad enough, today Rush had his left breast groped by Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Not since then, huh?
The US beat Norway 1-0 in the women’s World Cup. I haven’t seen that many cute blonde girls frantically running around since Bill Clinton visited Arnold Schwarzenegger on the set.

Mmmm mmm dead
At the Texas State Fair they are now serving batter dipped deep fried Oreos. My cholesterol just went up hearing about that.

We tried here at "A Little Bit Bad" to interview someone who ate the batter-deep fried Oreos to get their opinion, but nobody who has eaten them has had their heart last long enough long enough to talk to us.

I’m in a New York state of fine
New York has made a law which will fine non-athletes if they step on the field. You know what this means? Next year the New York Mets will have to pay to play.

More bad news for the New York Jets . . .

This means New York Yankee pitcher David Wells will have to make a trip to the ATM before each start.