Saturday, August 30, 2003

We got to throw down and hit that all up in this here Hizzy, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

(Willy picks a tune out and he blows it on the Harp)

Mon dieu!
At the U.S. Open, 31 seed Arnaud Clement was bitterly upset about noise from a nearby jazz band during his second round loss to fellow Frenchman Gregory Carraz; “It was typically American;” hissed Clement; “It’s total disrespect.” Now come on, Arnaud; that is not fair. We respect the French. Why, without the French, we wouldn’t have, uh, well, for example, if not for France, we couldn’t, uh . . . so what kind of band was it?

Two in a Bush
Arnold Schwarzenegger is quoted as saying “Gay sex should be between a man and a woman.” So apparently Schwarzenegger is getting advice from President Bush.

Must see MTV
Did you see the MTV video awards? Madonna open-mouth kissed Britney Spears and Christine Aguilera. Apparently MTV now stands for Massaging Thyself Vigorously.

Man, oh, man, now I really want my MTV.

Of course that whole Madonna kissing Britney Spears and Christine Aguilera was just a cheap publicity stunt . . . a wonderful, lovely, and magnificent cheap publicity stunt.

Lots of things happened in the news besides the Madonna/Britney/Christina MTV awards open-mouth kiss, but, for some reason, I can’t seem to remember what they were . . .

Man, it is hot and muggy today, Slats and Nuggies, I tell ya, I am sweatin' like Ellen DeGeneris watching Madonna kiss Britney.