Step off wit' yo' good foot, now, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers
That desperate?
Rumor has it they are really close to closing in on Saddam Hussein. To give you an idea how desperate Saddam is, today he saw the movie “Gigli” just so nobody would be near him.
It was so hot this weekend, people went to see “Gigli” just to feel the cool breeze generated from how much it sucked.
How bad was “Gigli?” Uday and Qusay Hussein wouldn’t be caught dead watching it.
How bad was “Gigli?” Not to put too fine a point on it, but Seabiscuit left things in his stall that were better than “Gigli.”
How bad was the chemistry between Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck in “Gigli?” David Gest and Liza Minelli couldn’t see them as a couple.
How bad is “Gigli?” Madonna is making fun of it.
He got Lay’d
Former Enron chairman Ken Lay took nearly $1 million in losses in selling his four properties in Aspen. In fact, it was the worst financial move in Colorado since Kobe ordered room service.
Bad choice
Kobe Bryant and his wife, Vanessa, attended Saturday’s Teen Choice Awards in Los Angeles. Was that a good idea? Wasn’t it Kobe’s choice of a teen what got him in trouble in the first place?
Broke joke
*Mike Tyson has filed for bankruptcy. This following years after he filed for moral bankruptcy.
Tyson has squandered over $300 million in ring earnings. Today he was named an honorary board member of Enron.
What a rip-off
*Del Mar race track held “Seabiscuit Day” last Saturday. If you ask me it was a rip-off, I waited through every race and Seabiscuit never ran once.
Have you heard of Seabiscuit’s Italian cousin? Seabiscotti.
Do they take Tigers?
*Ferdinand, the 1986 Kentucky Derby winner, was apparently sold to slaughter for dog food by his Japanese owners. To which, Detroit Tigers owner Mike Illitch said; “You can do that?”
Innovative
“Hustler” publisher Larry Flynt has filed to enter the recall governor’s race in California. In fact, Flynt made political history by issuing the first campaign brochure with a scratch-and-sniff.
Nice spin
President Bush is headed to Texas for his vacation. His staff has labeled it a working vacation, in addition, they have decided re-name unemployment: a vacation from working.
Yuck
According to a new study by scientists, a chemical in saliva can help inflamed bowels. A fact that Hollywood movie stars and their assistants have known for years.
That desperate?
Rumor has it they are really close to closing in on Saddam Hussein. To give you an idea how desperate Saddam is, today he saw the movie “Gigli” just so nobody would be near him.
It was so hot this weekend, people went to see “Gigli” just to feel the cool breeze generated from how much it sucked.
How bad was “Gigli?” Uday and Qusay Hussein wouldn’t be caught dead watching it.
How bad was “Gigli?” Not to put too fine a point on it, but Seabiscuit left things in his stall that were better than “Gigli.”
How bad was the chemistry between Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck in “Gigli?” David Gest and Liza Minelli couldn’t see them as a couple.
How bad is “Gigli?” Madonna is making fun of it.
He got Lay’d
Former Enron chairman Ken Lay took nearly $1 million in losses in selling his four properties in Aspen. In fact, it was the worst financial move in Colorado since Kobe ordered room service.
Bad choice
Kobe Bryant and his wife, Vanessa, attended Saturday’s Teen Choice Awards in Los Angeles. Was that a good idea? Wasn’t it Kobe’s choice of a teen what got him in trouble in the first place?
Broke joke
*Mike Tyson has filed for bankruptcy. This following years after he filed for moral bankruptcy.
Tyson has squandered over $300 million in ring earnings. Today he was named an honorary board member of Enron.
What a rip-off
*Del Mar race track held “Seabiscuit Day” last Saturday. If you ask me it was a rip-off, I waited through every race and Seabiscuit never ran once.
Have you heard of Seabiscuit’s Italian cousin? Seabiscotti.
Do they take Tigers?
*Ferdinand, the 1986 Kentucky Derby winner, was apparently sold to slaughter for dog food by his Japanese owners. To which, Detroit Tigers owner Mike Illitch said; “You can do that?”
Innovative
“Hustler” publisher Larry Flynt has filed to enter the recall governor’s race in California. In fact, Flynt made political history by issuing the first campaign brochure with a scratch-and-sniff.
Nice spin
President Bush is headed to Texas for his vacation. His staff has labeled it a working vacation, in addition, they have decided re-name unemployment: a vacation from working.
Yuck
According to a new study by scientists, a chemical in saliva can help inflamed bowels. A fact that Hollywood movie stars and their assistants have known for years.
posted by Alex at
1:21 PM
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