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Matt Lauer’s wife kicked him out of his house. Matt knew it was trouble when he got home and she said, “Where in the world is Matt Lauer? Anywhere but here, buster.”

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For the second time, an Eagles fan was arrested for punching a police horse. The prosecution will tack on the mounting evidence of a haymaker punch to paint him as the mane culprit and saddle him with charges. So there will be no bale.

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In Saudi Arabia, several camels, in a camel beauty contest, were disqualified for using botox. And that is this week’s topic that, if I had created it, would make me a racist.

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In Saudi Arabia, several camels, in a camel beauty contest, were disqualified for using botox. And yet the silicone injections in the hump go unpunished. 

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Sunday was the SAG Awards given by actors to actors for acting with the award itself called The Actor. Here’s my question: Why is there no award for the best acceptance of The Actor award? 

If these clowns were any farther up their own asses they would be proctologists.

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Bill Cosby performed comedy at a Philadelphia jazz club to a friendly crowd. And the good news is Cosby did not drug and rape anyone.

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After dating actress Olivia Munn, Packers QB, Aaron Rodgers, is now dating race car driver, Danica Patrick. It seems Aaron has a type. Short, dark and sassy. Sorry, Clay Matthews III. 

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Matt Lauer’s wife kicked him out of his house. Actually she locked him out with a button she had installed under her desk.


Since you asked:

There are three kinds of stupid:


There are the sweet, kind, blissfully stupid who are so stupid, they have no idea they're stupid. 

Then there are the tragically stupid who are just smart enough to know they're stupid, like Forrest Gump. 

Finally there are the dangerously stupid who are just dumb enough to actually believe they're smart. Like actors. They are the most entertaining, but also the most destructive. 

That's Donald Trump.