It is hard out here
We takin’; it to the breakin’ it, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers
Mel, such a mouth on you, you shouldn’t believe, oy vey
Mel Gibson apologized for his obscenity-laced drunk driving arrest and admitted he made a stupid decision and that he said really stupid things. On the bright side, making a stupid decision and saying really stupid things puts Mel at the top of the list to portray President Bush in a movie.
Campy humor
The NFL training camps are underway. That is where the players sweat, cry, swear and yell. And that is just at the press conference when they deny testing positive for drugs.
Barry’s cherry
Testimony in a grand jury investigation reveals that Barry Bonds cheated on baseball with steroids, Bonds cheated on his wife with a mistress and he cheated on his mistress with another woman and Bonds cheated on his taxes. Anyone want to guess what Barry does with his golf score?
The moral of the story? Don’t play poker with Barry Bonds.
Testimony in a grand jury investigation reveals that Barry Bonds has alienated, and is despised by, every single person he has come in contact with and Bonds has cheated and lied at every single endeavor he has undertaken. In short, Barry Bonds would make a dynamite entertainment attorney.
This one hurts
The Milwaukee Brewers have added a new contestant in the Miller Park sausage race. The Mexican Chorizo. Nobody knows what Brat this on, but the Chorizo will have to mustard up some courage to ketchup if it wants to be a wiener.
Busy boy
Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chris Henry was arrested four times in a matter of months on charges that included speeding, DUI, driving without a license and insurance, weapons possession, marijuana possession and providing alcohol to underage girls. Or as that is known in the NBA: a weekend.
Since you asked:
Went to a party last night and came home at ten after two drinks. Going to go work out and get my car washed.
For the first time in I-don’t-even-want-to-think-how-long, my car is clean, my office is spotless, my closet is neat and organized. It’s like I don’t know who I am any more.
Floyd Landis tested positive for too much testosterone and blamed it on drinking whisky the night before. Boy, if that doesn’t make his Mennonite parents proud, I don’t know what will.
Missed my comedy writing buddy Janice Hough in town for the weekend. We had scheduling snafu’s on our part – not hers – including late floor installation and a tummy ache, and it caused us to miss meeting each other and our better halves for dinner or drinks. Janice, I owe you. Have you had a Santa Maria BBQ? Next time, I promise. Janice is truly a comic genius.
Mel, such a mouth on you, you shouldn’t believe, oy vey
Mel Gibson apologized for his obscenity-laced drunk driving arrest and admitted he made a stupid decision and that he said really stupid things. On the bright side, making a stupid decision and saying really stupid things puts Mel at the top of the list to portray President Bush in a movie.
Campy humor
The NFL training camps are underway. That is where the players sweat, cry, swear and yell. And that is just at the press conference when they deny testing positive for drugs.
Barry’s cherry
Testimony in a grand jury investigation reveals that Barry Bonds cheated on baseball with steroids, Bonds cheated on his wife with a mistress and he cheated on his mistress with another woman and Bonds cheated on his taxes. Anyone want to guess what Barry does with his golf score?
The moral of the story? Don’t play poker with Barry Bonds.
Testimony in a grand jury investigation reveals that Barry Bonds has alienated, and is despised by, every single person he has come in contact with and Bonds has cheated and lied at every single endeavor he has undertaken. In short, Barry Bonds would make a dynamite entertainment attorney.
This one hurts
The Milwaukee Brewers have added a new contestant in the Miller Park sausage race. The Mexican Chorizo. Nobody knows what Brat this on, but the Chorizo will have to mustard up some courage to ketchup if it wants to be a wiener.
Busy boy
Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chris Henry was arrested four times in a matter of months on charges that included speeding, DUI, driving without a license and insurance, weapons possession, marijuana possession and providing alcohol to underage girls. Or as that is known in the NBA: a weekend.
Since you asked:
Went to a party last night and came home at ten after two drinks. Going to go work out and get my car washed.
For the first time in I-don’t-even-want-to-think-how-long, my car is clean, my office is spotless, my closet is neat and organized. It’s like I don’t know who I am any more.
Floyd Landis tested positive for too much testosterone and blamed it on drinking whisky the night before. Boy, if that doesn’t make his Mennonite parents proud, I don’t know what will.
Missed my comedy writing buddy Janice Hough in town for the weekend. We had scheduling snafu’s on our part – not hers – including late floor installation and a tummy ache, and it caused us to miss meeting each other and our better halves for dinner or drinks. Janice, I owe you. Have you had a Santa Maria BBQ? Next time, I promise. Janice is truly a comic genius.
posted by Alex at
1:19 PM
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