Greetings Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers.
How about those people who were trapped in a deep hole in the ground? But enough about stock holders, how about those minors?
There was an embarrassing moment when President Bush met with the Pennsylvania minors. He was shocked to discover that they were all over 18.
The Walt Disney Co. has a nearly $1.5 million deal for the rights to the personal stories of the nine Pennsylvania miners whose miraculous rescue riveted the nation. When asked to comment, President Bush replied, “Disney is a good choice. They make good cartoons for minors.” President Bush, as you may know, is vacationing this month in Texas. And why the heck not? Saddam has been kicked out, the al Quida and Osama have been caught and the stock market and the economy are doing just great. No? Well, there is that other stuff he did . . .
I can hardly wait for the next “The Anna Nicole Show.” The good news is that Anna hooks up with a hot date. The bad news: she meets him at her family reunion. The only good news for E’s “The Anna Nicole Show” is that TV Guide had already listed the worst TV shows in history before it aired. A review in “Entertainment Weekly” described “The Anna Nicole Smith Show” as “an obscene train wreck.” Amtrak then objected to that description as an insult to their train wrecks.
During the first “The Anna Nicole Smith Show” Anna Nicole slurred her words. So she is either wasted, or they used Ozzy Osbourne’s voice coach. It is painful to watch “The Anna Nicole Show.” Throughout the show, a morbidly obese Smith is seen stuffing her face, she slurs her words, and generally acts truly bizarre. If she was an animal, they would have to put her down.
President Bush agreed to be interviewed on CBS’s “Sixty Minutes.” Bush was pressed for time so he only had one question: “How long is the show?”
The latest trend for brides-to-be is secondary virginity. They cut off sex from the husband-to-be for months before the wedding. And women wonder why guys don’t commit.
The story is a Russian mobster arranged a vote swap to fix the Olympic ice dancing. If this is true, that only leaves synchronized swimming as the only legitimate gay sport. Next thing you know they will accuse pro wrestling of being staged.
A report says five agencies under Justice Department jurisdiction, including the FBI, have reported 775 missing or stolen weapons and 400 missing laptop computers. No wonder the FBI can’t ever get any information, somebody stole their computers.This is going to restore faith in the F.B.I. “Go out and arrest those criminals from the list I emailed you.” “I can’t, they stole my computer and my gun.” Hell, even Barney Fife could hang on to his pistol and that one bullet.
How about those people who were trapped in a deep hole in the ground? But enough about stock holders, how about those minors?
There was an embarrassing moment when President Bush met with the Pennsylvania minors. He was shocked to discover that they were all over 18.
The Walt Disney Co. has a nearly $1.5 million deal for the rights to the personal stories of the nine Pennsylvania miners whose miraculous rescue riveted the nation. When asked to comment, President Bush replied, “Disney is a good choice. They make good cartoons for minors.” President Bush, as you may know, is vacationing this month in Texas. And why the heck not? Saddam has been kicked out, the al Quida and Osama have been caught and the stock market and the economy are doing just great. No? Well, there is that other stuff he did . . .
I can hardly wait for the next “The Anna Nicole Show.” The good news is that Anna hooks up with a hot date. The bad news: she meets him at her family reunion. The only good news for E’s “The Anna Nicole Show” is that TV Guide had already listed the worst TV shows in history before it aired. A review in “Entertainment Weekly” described “The Anna Nicole Smith Show” as “an obscene train wreck.” Amtrak then objected to that description as an insult to their train wrecks.
During the first “The Anna Nicole Smith Show” Anna Nicole slurred her words. So she is either wasted, or they used Ozzy Osbourne’s voice coach. It is painful to watch “The Anna Nicole Show.” Throughout the show, a morbidly obese Smith is seen stuffing her face, she slurs her words, and generally acts truly bizarre. If she was an animal, they would have to put her down.
President Bush agreed to be interviewed on CBS’s “Sixty Minutes.” Bush was pressed for time so he only had one question: “How long is the show?”
The latest trend for brides-to-be is secondary virginity. They cut off sex from the husband-to-be for months before the wedding. And women wonder why guys don’t commit.
The story is a Russian mobster arranged a vote swap to fix the Olympic ice dancing. If this is true, that only leaves synchronized swimming as the only legitimate gay sport. Next thing you know they will accuse pro wrestling of being staged.
A report says five agencies under Justice Department jurisdiction, including the FBI, have reported 775 missing or stolen weapons and 400 missing laptop computers. No wonder the FBI can’t ever get any information, somebody stole their computers.This is going to restore faith in the F.B.I. “Go out and arrest those criminals from the list I emailed you.” “I can’t, they stole my computer and my gun.” Hell, even Barney Fife could hang on to his pistol and that one bullet.
posted by Alex at
4:12 PM
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