You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

Boston University claims it has a new way to detect brain injuries in NFL players. When asked what he thought about the new diagnosis for brain injuries, New England Patriot’s Rob Gronkowski said, “What do I care? I’m a firetruck.” 

There is going to be a Broadway musical based on the life of Cher. “I have no interest in a Broadway musical about Cher,” said not one single gay man ever.

New York Giant receiver, Odell Beckham Jr., was fined $12,154 for his touchdown celebration against the Eagles where he imitated a dog urinating. The fine sounds bad, but it would have been $85,000 in dog years fines.

New York Giant, Odell Beckham Jr., was fined $12,154 for his touchdown celebration against the Eagles where he imitated a dog urinating. That’s nothing You should see the dog celebration Beckham has planned if the Giants play on Wednesday, or hump day.

There is going to be a Broadway musical based on the life of Cher. It is being billed as the gay crack of theatric productions.

They’re going to make a movie about the Chicago Cubs 2016 World Series win and Bill Murray will play manager Joe Maddon. That is life imitating art imitating life imitating perfection. 

Our intelligence claims morale inside the Taliban is extremely low. They’re going to hold a team-building happy hour at Thank Allah It’s Friday.

Hugh Hefner passed at 91. Hef will be remembered for changing our lexicon. He gave us the the terms center-fold and Playmate. He brought new meaning to bunnies and “Mom, don’t come in here, I’m busy.” 

Hugh Hefner passed and people are remembering his innovations. The Centerfold. The Playmate. Putting the Chicago Playboy building on Whacker Drive.

Sources say the Taliban’s morale is it an all-time low. Looks like someone could use an ugly sweater contest. 

Sources say the Taliban’s morale is it an all-time low. To combat low morale, the Taliban is going to award a Suicide Bomber of the Month trophy.