Tuesday, September 26, 2017

Funk Zone Wally

Funk Zone Wally doin’ his thang, Funk Zone Wally’s a real good hang, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers


Last week, FEMA tweeted out the wrong number for a roof repair company and gave a phone sex line instead. One conversation about spackling the attic turned really ugly.

One conversation about shellacking the chimney went really weird.

The sex line operators were shocked at all the people complaining about getting leaked on.  


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Anthony Weiner sentenced to 21 months for sexting a 15-year-old girl. There are worse things than a pedophile named Weiner going to prison. Oh, right. No there isn’t.




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Megyn Kelly launched “Megyn Kelly Today” and the reviews were not kind. The consensus is Megyn is like a soccer mom trying way too hard to be the cool mom.

The good news is Donald Trump did not Tweet Megyn was bleeding from anywhere.






Jared Kushner and Ivanka used private emails for White House use. Upon hearing this, Hillary Clinton almost dropped her bottle of Chardonnay. 



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A representative for the Mad Pooper claims the woman defecating on lawns underwent a sex-change operation. For the love of god, Caitlyn Jenner, turn yourself in.



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Treas. Sec., Steve Mnuchin, said NFL players give up free speech when they’re on the field. Mnuchin then boarded a government jet for a personal trip. 



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Saudi Arabia is going to let women drive. And, on November 5th, they’re going to set their clocks back one hour and their calendars forward fifty years.