The rumors persist Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are getting a divorce over his Twitter rants and it will get ugly between the Kardashian family and Kanye. They will make a movie about it: “Dumb and Dumber, The Number After Two.”  

The Chicago Cubs are listed as 4-1 favorites to win the World Series. In addition, Las Vegas just improved the odds of monkeys flying out of my butt. 

Members of Parliament sent a letter to the NFL asking them to change the name of the Washington Redskins. Granted, Redskins isn’t the greatest name, but England can tell us what to call things after they change the name of their town, Cockermouth, Cumbria. 

Chris Christie has endorsed Donald Trump. This locks up the guys-who-grab-their-crotch-and-spit vote. 

Despite his anti-immigrant stance, Donald Trump hired 500 foreign workers at his Florida resort. This should not come as a shock from a guy who has a Palapa on his head. 

Mitt Romney claims there is a bombshell in Donald Trump’s tax history. This comment is so white it could be nominated for an Oscar. 

Astronaut Scott Kelley is returning to earth after a year in space. He cannot wait to spend his bitcoins at Radio Shack. 


Since you asked:

There is this nice guy in our neighborhood with black glasses who walks his old dog at 4:30 like clockwork. Recently, I truly admired his patience because his beloved little black and white ‘ol weiner/mutt doggy with the white face was getting pretty slow. 

Today he was walking a puppy.