An historian claims Adolf Hitler had a condition that gave him a deformed, tiny penis. And you thought his mustache was short, ugly and stubby.

The condition is known as: Dictator-tot. 

Hillary Clinton narrowly defeated Bernie Sanders in Nevada. While Hillary flew to Houston, Bill Clinton stayed back in Nevada to personally thank each and every member of Hookers for Hillary. 

A 28-year-old Arkansas math teacher was charged with having sex with her three male students, two 17, one 18. Which, in Arkansas, sounds much worse when you consider they were only in fourth grade.   

The Minnesota Wild beat the Chicago Blackhawks 6-1 outdoors in the stadium series. Playing hockey outside in a stadium looks like fun. The Blackhawks should try it sometime.

An historian claims Adolf Hitler suffered from a condition that gave him just one testicle and an abnormally small, deformed penis. The condition is known as Trumpatosis. 

Since you asked:

Sometimes the more complicated an issue, the easier it is to simplify. Something tells me Apple versus the FBI on the San Bernardino terrorist’s phone privacy is one of those. 

What it seems to boil down to is that preventing more terrorists from slaughtering 14 people is more important than the privacy of a cell phone.