Tuesday, October 06, 2015

The Lions get screwed on the Pat Spat, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

The first recorded use of the F-word was in the 1300’s. The exact quote was ;“Is that Larry “Effing” King?”

Twitter has a new feature called “Moments.” It is for new Twitter users. Next, for older folks, they will have a feature called “Senior Moments.” It reminds you what you were doing before you forgot.

A powerful firefighter union has dropped their endorsement of Hillary Clinton. They figure there was enough hosing during Bill’s administration.

The scientists who discovered Neutrinos won the Nobel Prize for physics. That’s great. But did they even look at my treatise on the effects on Halloween of doorstep flaming poop bags?

Google has dropped their corporate motto: “Don’t be evil.” It has been replaced with; “Google: We Got All the Money.”

A Dutchman, Ed Houben, has fathered 106 children.  In Europe, Ed is officially tied for fathering the most kids with Mick Jagger and every single Viking who ever lived.

On “MNF”, the Seattle Seahawks beat the Detroit Lions, 13-10 on a blown call by the referees. The refs missed a penalty for a ball that was patted away. This is the biggest controversy in sports involving a single ball since, well, Lance Armstrong.

The Seattle Seahawks beat the Detroit Lions, 13-10 on a blown batted-ball call by the referees. If that wasn’t bad enough, it turns out the ball was under-inflated.

This is the worst a Lion has gotten screwed since Cecil ran across that douche-bag dentist.