An internal investigation of the TSA revealed undercover investigators were able to sneak 95% of weapons and fake bombs past TSA airport checkpoints. The low-point was when the bowling ball with the burning fuse got by.

The Pope said he has not watched TV since 1990. Apparently the Pope had it with TV after they cancelled “Alf.” 

Newark, New Jersey residents are being warned not to eat the fish they find washing up on the streets. They should stick to eating the fish that fell out of a truck.