This guy

Made this guy

Look like this guy

Kris Jenner is livid at Bruce Jenner for going on a date with her friend, Ronda Kamihira. In Bruce’s defense, it wasn’t so much a date as it was a girls-night-out.

The man in charge of the Secret Service prostitute scandal was caught with a prostitute. Asked to comment, he said; “Hey, you want a thorough investigation or not?”

Earlier this month, a riot broke out at a New Hampshire pumpkin patch. Investigators are now saying it wasn’t a riot, it was a bunch of white people attempting a jumping chest bump and missing.

Charges are now being reduced from resisting arrest down to just being wicked stupid.