Tuesday, June 04, 2013

Way to go, Baby Horse. The Awesome Alex Morgan of the US women's soccer team on a SUP

Slap it, whap it, snap it and tap it, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

The French have finally given a name for a French kiss: Galocher. It means cold sore provider.

Oprah told Harvard graduates how they deal with hard times will ultimately define their success; it is, without a doubt, the most inspirational advice on hard times ever given by a multi-billionaire.

Mariah Carey and Nicki Minaj are both leaving "American Idol." "Gosh, I hope I can get them in my think tank," said nobody. 

The French have finally given a name for a French kiss: Galocher. Notice how they put the word Cher in there? Because she was there when it first happened.

People are complaining a teapot from Penny’s looks like Adolf Hitler; personally, I am more concerned that North Korea’s leader, Kim Jong Un, looks like a lesbian Pokemon doll.

The Pakistani Taliban has named a new second-in-command after their last one was killed in a drone strike. His name is Noah Epheen Way.  

In New York, Starbucks employees are suing over who gets to keep the tips; so the question is, should the tips go to the guy who takes the order down wrong or the barista who makes the order wrong?

Random Lex Thoughts:

A high school girl asks Houston Rocket Chandler Parsons to her prom. He politely declines, but sends her an awesome party bus. What a class act.

Kim and Kanye are having their baby soon. Kris Jenner is excited to be a grandmother and Bruce Jenner is excited to be a scary Aunt.

Blackhawks and Kings. Interesting to see how the LA fans compare to Chicago’s.

Can we just take away the insanity plea for mass killers? We already know they’re insane. The only question is: did they do it or not? If they did? Guilty.

Cuddling-up my puppy, Wally, has become a physical need like sleeping and eating.

Two Senators sent a letter to the Washington Redskins asking them to change their name. In a perfect world, the Redskins write back: “You’re right, it is an awful and disgraceful name we should be horribly humiliated by and ashamed; it conjures up memories of a truly criminal history. From now on we are the District of Columbia Redskins.

Garrrrl, you know Katherine Zeta Jones be all; "M.D., you best get your moldy old ass down there and whistle in the wheat field."

Grilling my awesome Steak San Guidos from Escondido. Chimichurri-marinated sirloin on grilled French bread with garlic butter sauce, roasted red peppers and melted Havarti cheese. Go ‘Hawks. Might quaff a beer or two.