Sunday, April 15, 2012

You know how you can just look at some people and know they are suspect? It usually isn't one thing - although it can be, like a bluetooth earpiece or Birkenstocks and socks - but usually it is a collection of things.

There was a guy of bigger than normal size talking very loudly in line at the grocery store on his cell phone. His body language seemed really confident, like he knew how to handle himself on a soccer or rugby field, and he was quite hairy.

The next thing I noticed were his his white and gold disco t-shirt and designer jeans.

He was really loud and animatedly yelling in a different language that I couldn't quite make out. My guess is Eastern European, like Hungarian.

We had these awesome hard-working Serbs who did our remodel and, to my untrained ear, it always sounded like they were saying;

"Push, push, in zee bush.'"

That's what this guy sounded like.Maybe with a bit more Turkish. And just below shouting.

But what was classic with this guy was he was under the delusion we couldn't understand him when he sprinkled his conversation with English profanity, sounding something like this:

"Meesh, push, moosh, shcmoo mash heeshin a$$hole push smashesh mesh wuss cuss heesh c@cksucker wahs shoeeloosh shumlee muss pr*ck."

Trust me, it was hilarious.