Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Thanks for the Manatees

Congratulations to Bubba Watson for winning the Masters. Did you see how emotional Bubba was when he won? I haven’t seen a man cry like that since House Speaker John Boehner watched “War Horse.”

“War Horse” is on DVD. Don’t confuse “War Horse” with the preposed reality show contest between Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton. That will be called “Whore Wars.”

Donald Trump will allow transgender contestants in the Miss Universe Pageant; the Donald is sensitive to sex operations ever since he had to have that thing on top of his head neutered.

Rick Santorum has announced he is suspending his campaign; he called it suspending because he is too conservative to call it pulling out.

When asked to comment, comedy writers and sweater vest manufacturers screamed; “No.”

A Muncie IN woman was arrested for trying to rip the testicles off of her boyfriend when he broke up with her. The cause of the break up? Her anger issues.

She claims it happened because she was feeling a little testy.

There is a smart phone app that directs people who have to use a bathroom to private homes. Download the app at Don't-Drop-A-Duece.com