Monday, April 04, 2011

Nice brim, Dude, you be stylin'

This right here how you get it done, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

The Space Shuttle Endeavour will go on permanent display at USC. Students can’t wait to have sex on top of it.

Snooki says she hates how scenes of “Jersey Shore” make her look like an idiot. Uh, Snooki, darling, they don’t make you look like an idiot, they reveal that you are an idiot.

Due to their owner's close connection with Bernie Madoff, the New York Mets and Fred Wilpon are in bad financial shape. The opening pitch will be replaced by a pitch from an Amway salesman.

Since you asked:
Got to admit, the New York Mets financial woes are giving me a serious case of Schadenfreude. The Mets’ sleazebag owner, Fred Wilpon, supposedly worked with and profited with Bernie Madoff and, as a result, could get sued by the Madoff victims for one billion. This scum-nozzle didn’t just invest with and recruit clients for Madoff, he profited from giving Madoff those assets. In other words, Wilpon is in the same sleaze league as Bernie Madoff, and that is saying a lot.

From the very start, the Mets have reeked of a classless organization from their origins at the expense of the fans of the Brooklyn Dodgers who got screwed by - not Dodgers owner, Walter O’Malley - but egomaniacal New York building supervisor and mob- whore, Robert Moses.

Two of the biggest a-holes I have ever met were Mets legends Rusty Staub and world class-douche bag, Ron Darling. What tools. And look what classy role models Mets stars Doc Gooden and Darryl Strawberry turned out to be.

That and a die-hard Met fan I had the misfortune to know on Wall Street, who tried to get me fired, was so ugly in mind, spirit and body and so obnoxious about the Mets, the mere thought of the Mets bringing this scary witch joy in any way almost makes me puke.

Shea Stadium was an eyesore before it was falling apart and Flushing Meadows was aptly named before the urban blight.

Throw that in with the ugly orange, a stupid name and the fact that many, many of their fans - not all, especially any “AlBb” readers, like Jooch - are fat, ugly, loud and obnoxious bad sports. Red Sox fans will have you believe Yankee fans are also like that, but in my experience, Yankee fans are like golf or polo fans compared to the crassness and all-around vulgarity of Mets fans.

Plus there is the little fact of what the dog-ass Mets did to my beloved Cubbies in 1969. No, Mets fans have all the obnoxious loud and ugly brashness if New York Jets fans, but without the fun-loving sense of humor.