Saturday, April 02, 2011

Wooddeally woodeally woo hoo hoo

When we had no fowl, we would eat the crawdad. When we could find no crawdad, we ate sand, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

They found the lost Bronx Zoo cobra alive. It was still in the building. Turns out the snake just ducked into an office to use the computer to book tickets for the annual American Bar Association.

Two USC students, man and woman, were openly seen having sex on a campus rooftop during the day. You know who really got screwed? The parents who pay their tuitions.

They found the lost Bronx Zoo cobra alive. It never left the building. How bad is a neighborhood when even deadly snakes are afraid to go wander outside?

Two USC students, man and woman, were recorded having sex on a campus rooftop during the day in full view of the whole school. How much do you want to bet these two idiots get a reality show? How much more do you want to bet it will be called: “Rooftop Trojans.”?

Donald Trump continues to spout about running for President. Can you imagine if Trump is elected President? You thought a lot of crap was named after him now? It will be the Trump White House, Trump Air Force One, Camp David Trump.

With negotiations stopped between owner and players, the NFL should use this lockout time to investigate a serious problem: How Buffalo Hot Wings is able to rig games using an old guy manipulating the sprinkler system. And why are they watering artificial turf fields?

Another snowstorm has hit the northeast. But we Californians have our weather troubles too. Now that it is daylight savings time, we constantly have to remember to wear our sunglasses an hour longer.

Singer Michael Buble got married. A sick part of me always hoped one day Michael Buble would hook up with Justin Bieber, that way we could call them Justichael Bierbub.

50 employees at a Japanese nuclear plant face almost certain death to save the rest of the country. In the US, workers walk off the job when asked to pay for their own coffee.

Did you know that Lindsay Lohan has dropped her last name, Lohan? She is just Lindsay. And the other night in New York at 2:00 AM she also dropped Lindsay. She dropped Lindsay face first on the sidewalk outside a club.

Yep, paparazzi photos show a drunk Lindsay Lohan falling face first on the sidewalk outside a New York Nightclub at 2:00 AM. It wasn’t all the booze’s fault, Lindsay toppled over from the weight of all the silverware she stole and snuck in her blouse.

Adam Lambert showed up at Lady Gaga’s 25th birthday party in L.A. and was so drunk and obnoxious he was asked to leave. How annoying are you when a woman who travels in an egg and wears meat dresses thinks you’re too wild?

Since you asked:

Got a good workout followed by grilled Lex’s steaks sandguidos ala Escondido and final four viewage on tap, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers. And yes, a few San Diego Sunsets.

And a hay nan nanny and a hah cha cha.